My Life's Musings...

Wow...it's been a LONG time...

2011-06-18T10:06:00.000-07:00

It certainly has been a long time since I've posted here @ my General Blog...I miss it alot & things have been so busy in my life since my last post that I hardly know where to begin. First of all, dearest husband Michael is a huge inspiration to me, with all of his health problems over the years ~ and yet, he continues to hang in there, offering it all up, never complaining about any of it...except of course, lol, an occasional comment here & there about those in the health care profession who don't appear to know what they are doing. But hasn't that always been a source of amusement to anyone with health issues, at least anyone who refuses to dwell on the negative?!? Staying in the hospital, visits to all kinds of offices (he has at least 10 specialists that he sees regularly)...etc....
And of course, the family. :) Having eight children, all grown, with two grandsons & a granddaughter on the way, it is ever-expanding! Never a dull moment around here, nor is one expected to hit anytime soon. So, I continue to be a very interested spectator of the show that is forever being played out before my very eyes. Keeping up with all of this has certainly taught me alot about life, most interestingly, about my own...and it will always be like this, I'm afraid. But I would not have it any other way, as I think back to my own childhood, all those long years ago, never having dreamed of what lay in store for me!! And now that I can see from the other side, so to speak, I understand more fully than I would have thought possible why God planned my early years the way that He did...it did so much to prepare me for what I have come to understand as my life's journey...and I am forever grateful for the preparation, lol.
Every mother who has ever gone through a miscarriage can attest to the fact that, having lost a baby, there is a part of you that is never the same after that...and I am no exception. I myself have lost two, one of which would have been my second-born & the other, the ninth. Sometimes I think of these two little ones, knowing that my family would have been so-o very different had they been allowed a chance to live, and yet I can't help but be curious about how that would have been, too...I know that they are both in Heaven, watching over us ~ probably sharing a good laugh at it all ~ and waiting patiently for the day when we will all be together. But I wonder about what they would have looked like, what they would have liked to do with their time, and how they would have gotten along with their brothers & sisters... I had an Aunt who was the mother of eleven children & she used to tell me that she was waiting for me to "catch up with her," lol...and I used to tell her that I was only one behind. :) These two babies were never named by us, as we gave that privilege to our Most Holy Mother Mary in Heaven...telling Her that we would be happy to learn of the names that She chose when we get there. And I have never forgotten this. I miss these two & I cannot wait to meet them.
Other than that, my life has been very complete & happy...I continue to do what I love to do ~ that is, be here spending my days & nights with the people whom I love the most, enjoying the never-ending parade of antics that they are so kind as to put on for my amusement. And I hope & pray that this never ends ~ during my own lifetime, at least! :) xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Do you ever...

2010-02-20T08:57:00.000-08:00

Do you ever sit & wonder about things? Like, I have this Blog. What to write about? What is going on in my life today? Why does anyone care? Do I get any readers? or do they think to themselves, "O my goodness, get over yourself already?!?"
lol...
Well, I am not so conceited to think that there is anyone out there who gives a flying fig about what I think or how my life is going, day to day, other than my husband *God love his heart*, my children *ditto that* or hopefully, my grandson ~ someday.
Again, lol...
Well, for anyone "out there" who cares, my life is going just fine ~ and thank-you so much for asking, for caring, for giving a flying fig. The birds are still in the sky, freezing their tail feathers off probably. But do they seem bothered by it? Of course not! God created them to enjoy the vast big blue that is their home. And, believe me, they do! Every inch of it.
And as for the ground creatures ~ too much to keep track of, so I will simply dwell on one, for an example.
There is a gray squirrel who lives in the blue spruce in our front yard who scampers about the place like he owns it. He is perennially digging, burying, digging up what he buried yesterday...and his cycle goes on, day to day, just like mine does. Just like yesterday. And does he worry about the birds flying over his head? Of course not. He, like them, is doing what he was created to do. And there are a million other squirrels *of all colors* in the neighborhood doing exactly the same thing he is doing.
Every day. I say, good for them.
lol...
They don't care that I have things to do, places to go, people to see. We let each other live our respective lives, just as God intended. But when I sit and think, "What would my life be like without them in it? How would I like it if God had never created my fellow creatures?" I know it seems silly to be wondering about things like this, but things just come to me & I cannot stop it from happening...so I don't try.
I am told all the time *by those in the know* that I am not like most other people. And I am happy about that. I am what God made me. I try to live each day, each and every moment, as I would hope He would have me live. I don't care if others do as I do, think as I think or say as I say. It is enough for me that I do, think, say.
lol...
And for any of you "out there" who may give a flying fig, thank-you. But you needn't worry about it, if you have your own life to live. I won't try to stop you from it, I promise. Just once in a while, give a thought to me, to our fellow creatures, and thank God for all that He has done.
And try to give a flying fig.

A Good Start...

2010-02-02T14:11:00.000-08:00

Well, well, well... It's been forever since I posted here, but I think it's about time for an update. My life has been going along, day by day, much like it always has...nothing really too new here, no big problems, no life changes, all is well.
But I do have this video of Dr. Laura S., whom I greatly admire & to whom I listen as regularly as I possibly can. In this particular tape, taken from her account @ YouTube.com, she counsels a young wife & mother who, sadly, is not happy with her "nearly perfect" situation, and wants to know: should she try to get a nanny to help with her children? She would just enjoy them so much more, she is absolutely positive!!!
Oh, puh-leeze!!! give me a break!!! Here is Dr. Laura's "take" on the situation which is very much to the point & "motherly": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJVW0Vlnbss .
I have a signed copy of this book, A Salute to Stay-at-Home Moms, which I read from cover to cover & I must say that I couldn't agree with her more! Dr. Laura is, herself, a stay-at-home Mom to a now-grown young man, stationed overseas in the military...and she waxes eloquent every chance she gets about the trials, joys & blessings of her vocation ~ not as a doctor of Psychology, not as a radio talk-show host, but as a MOM.
And I couldn't agree with her more.

A Kiss for Sharing...

2009-06-20T19:03:00.000-07:00

Yesterday my family and I got together to inter our Mom's ashes alongside our Dad's in their vault @ the cemetery. We had put this off for a few months (and I admit this sounds unusual), because some were unable to stay long enough to do it after the funeral last January.
So, as we all gathered before the Wall of St. John the Evangelist and Apostle, we talked, laughed and prayed with our memories, stories and feelings.
My sister Anne brought a bottle of water holding two peonies to place into the vase on the front of the vault. Linda and Sue brought other items to place inside...and I was surprised at this, since it never occurred to me that I could have brought anything for them!
So, while the others were putting things into the vault, reminders of things that our parents had shared and collected in their 60+ years together, I was left standing there on the sidelines, wondering what I could have brought with me.
And it suddenly occurred to me that there was nothing I would have wanted to place inside.
Their lives are over and done. The memories they left behind will be enough to sustain my heart and make me smile, whenever I remember the little things that they did for me...or the things we did together as a family. Thinking of these things, these are thoughts and feelings that the three of us shared, just us alone.
I have had Masses said for the two of them, as they make their way to Heaven, if indeed they are not there already. I have no idea ~ God alone knows that! But if they are still in Purgatory, these will be helping them more than words can ever say...until they reach Home for all eternity.
Anne went on to tell me & Mike that the peony bush which had yielded the two flowers for the vase had been the same one that had grown in our maternal Grandparents' back yard, having been planted over a hundred years ago. That bush had been uprooted and transplanted into our parents own yard after Grandma broke up her housekeeping. Then, when Mom & Dad's house was torn down ~ after we had all gotten married and moved out ~ that same bush was moved to Anne's yard. When she & her Dave moved their family out of state, it was finally moved to her friend's house, where it blooms to this day.
There were several things that were put away into that small space on the wall, I don't even know all of it...but suffice it to say, thinking for myself, that my heart left a piece of itself there, too.
As I stood there trying to come up with something, I decided to do what was left to me, the very least, and yet, the very best thing I could ~ I kissed the tip of my fingers and pressed that kiss into the floor of the vault, with a prayer asking that they be allowed to share that kiss forever.
As I sit here now, at this moment, thinking of that moment, I don't think there was anything better I could have offered to my parents than to wish them togetherness for eternity.
Yes, the memory of my own small gift will undoubtedly be a part of my final touch to the two people in all the world who gave me my life.
Remembering my years growing up under their watchful eyes, planting "a kiss and a hug" on each of them, every single night of my life, until the day I moved out, with "wishes for pleasant dreams and a safe awakening"...
And I would only hope and pray that someday I will be able to give them each a kiss in Heaven.
Sometimes a thought will come to you that you wonder if it was by chance or if it was truly meant to be, only yours, only one time, but that one time in all of Time...
Yes, I did what I was always meant to do. Leaving them nothing material ~ they can't take any of that with them, anyway. No, what I would want for them would be eternal bliss in our Father's House. A bliss meant for a married couple who were meant for each other from the very beginning of Time, left by a daughter who loved them very much.
A wish for "a pleasant dream and a safe awakening," together, in Heaven...and a kiss for sharing...until we meet again.

I'm Such A Twit, lol...

2009-06-04T10:29:00.000-07:00

Ok ~ I cannot believe how long it's been since I wrote an update in here! How could I let it go like that!?!
Well, I am here to report that I am finally an official "Twit" and I will be logging in there as often as possible to let anyone who cares to know my daily thoughts. This Blog will continue to be home to my longer musings, as it was always meant to be...but it will be fun to catch others' quick doings as they happen! The link can be found on my sidebar to the right...
I love this little blue bird; he looks so happy to be here, doesn't he? :)
I am by no means abandoning my Blog ~ no NEVER that!! It's just that I find that many times I want to write an entry & lack the time to do so...so this will keep my "fans" updated, lol.
And it will keep my hand in the proverbial Internet "pot," so to speak.
So, onward and upward, as they say, eh? And let the fun begin!

Overstuffed...part 2.

2009-05-01T13:34:00.001-07:00

This is Fuzzy Bear. Cute, huh? Well, as cute as he is, there is a sad story attached to the way he first entered our lives.
It all started one day, late Spring, as beautiful a day outside as anyone could wish for. A day when the children want to be "out there" from dawn to dusk...and so, as any self-respecting mother of eight, I should be happy to report that my own would prove that they were no different than any others.
That's all fine and good, right?
Wrong.
If I had my 'druthers, I would have skipped this day entirely, Fuzzy Bear notwithstanding. If I have the youngest two in the house with me, safe and sound, and the other six are "out there" making their own small marks upon the world, as near and as far as their own neighborhood, why would anyone suspect that this day would be any different?
But even tho' it started out typically enough, never in my wildest dreams could I have predicted that one of my own nearest and dearest would end up spending the afternoon in the hospital Emergency Room, carrying on about a small scrape on her small finger, of all things ~ and that I would be grateful that she was!
Let me start at the beginning:
Mike was at work, had been since early morning. I was home, as usual, taking care of the house and children. It was a school day. And it is what happened after school that day is so entrenched upon my mind and heart that I will never forget it as long as I live.
It was after school hours, and the kiddos were all outside playing. Theresa, Laura & Clare had gone across the street to play at a friend's house. Sometime during that time, Theresa had decided that she wanted to come home to get something. Carrie B., the mom of their friends, stood in her front yard, watching T cross, making sure the way was safe. I had received a call that she was on her way home, so I was at our door, watching and holding onto Julia so that she couldn't escape into the yard, as I could not leave the house with Stephen crawling around.
Well, as T was half-way across the street, our young Clare decided that she wanted to accompany her sister, so she ran out into the road without warning, leaving Carrie grabbing after her, and myself pushing J back into the living room, screaming to T to grab C's hand, but too late!!
As she was turning to go back for her younger sister, C was in the middle of running out to her, not giving a look to either side to check for oncoming traffic or anything.
Well, as you can imagine, "enter from stage right" here a neighbor's newly licensed daughter, driving at about 5 mph, coming around the bend, blissfully ignorant of what was about to take place. Thankfully, as this teen confided in me later, she was doing only a crawling speed; she was always absolutely paranoid of children in the street, and so she never went above 5-10 mph. If it had been anyone else, who knows what would have happened?!?
The next thing we knew, Clare was lying on the street, crying her eyes out ~ but happily, safe!
Of course, the police were called immediately, the ambulance soon followed, and the driver was soon giving her side of the story to an officer who told us that he came as fast as he could, thinking of his own grandchildren and how he would feel if it was one of them...he didn't give the girl a ticket as it turned out; she was crying worse than Clare was!
We got C into the ambulance, taking her to the hospital to be on the safe side; by the end of her little adventure, the worst injury she had suffered was a scrape here and a bruise there...the most painful of all being the sidewalk burn to her little finger. (This was the thing that caused her worst anxiety all the while she was in the ER ~ and the nurses told me that this was a good thing, let her worry about such a small thing! It will keep her mind off of anything worse...)...but this was the worst, thank God!!!
Poor Michael, having received an emergency call at work from our older son Paul, was literally flying home along the freeway from 30 miles away, imagining the worst had befallen one of his little girls! It wasn't until he arrived home that he was able to reach me at the hospital and relieve his mind that all was well.
And now, on to the entrance of Fuzzy Bear into our lives.
Our neighbor down the street, Kathy G., heard all about Clare's misadventure and was, as usual, all helpfulness and sympathy. It was she who gifted this small bed friend to my injured daughter, and it is she who is remembered as being the "neighbor who was always there for us."
Fuzzy Bear went on to become a favored playmate to Clare (who was only four at this time) ~ and to this day, he ranks with Clown as a bed friend extraordinaire...
Many bed friends have come and gone in my children's lives, but there are a few, special ones that remain close to our hearts. And for the adventure of Clare on that day, in gratitude for all of her non-injuries, I can only say that Fuzzy will hold a special place in my own heart, as well.

Overstuffed...part 1.

2009-04-19T10:18:00.000-07:00

In the beginning, there was Clown, given to my unborn son Paul on that Christmas Eve, two months before his arrival. A gift, from my sister, his future Aunt, for her future nephew to look at from the confines of his crib?
Or maybe once in a while to cuddle...
Little did she know, Clown would one day go on to be the favorite playmate of a small boy, newly born, already creeping to the head of his crib, to be found with the foot of this bedfriend in his mouth, that very first time up from his very first nap in his new home.
My son Paul has been on the move since the day he was born. From the very beginning, he was able to creep around in his crib, never one to stay still under his covers.
Since his Aunt Linda had kept a nearly-identical clown for her own unborn son, due four months later than Paul, placing it on the shelf in his room ~ and most likely never letting him play with it, let alone, sleep every night with it by his pillow, holding the handy foot (bet you can't guess which one), mostly chewing it to bits, shredding its outfit, loving it to near-death.
Not so with my Paul. My son had an understanding with his own highly-favored Clown, from the very first moment of acquaintance. And that friendship lasted (and grew daily) for years, until the day he moved out to his own house, preparing to marry his Kristy. For many years, of course, it sat on a special shelf in his room after he had long outgrown that small boy stage, but always under his watchful eye, nonetheless.
Clown, as of the day he left, has been lovingly put away by me, his sentimental mother...safely tucked away until they move into their permanent abode, in a couple of years, so he can finally be put in a safe resting place, never to be moved again.
You see, when Paul was little, he carried Clown all over the place ~ mostly keeping it in the house, thank goodness ~ but a couple of times actually braving it out in the big world.
Which really made me nervous...
Since I had spent many hours searching garbage pails, basement laundry baskets, car back seats, you-name-its...so my little boy could sleep at night, I had no way to relax unless Clown was in the crib, or at least in his room.
Now, there he sits, in his hiding place, known only to yours truly, until he is once again reunited with his Paul, bringing to a happy conclusion that joyful and lifelong friendship that only a small boy and his Clown can share.

Woo-hoo! An Upgrade? ;)...

2009-03-11T09:36:00.000-07:00

So, I went and did it this time.
Yep, I got me a BlackBerry! ha! to all those who said I would never do it, to all those who said I was just copying others who had "fancy-schmancy" phones with doodads 'n' gadgets ~ flip-out key pads for texting, a hundred ringtones from which to choose, multiple functions ~ who needs all that, eh?
Well, as it turns out...I do!
I carry in my purse at least four items of some weight that could easily be converted into one small piece of no small consequence at all...which is the reason I decided to go with the BlackBerry that I chose.
Two days ago, Mike & I went to our local Sprint store & I finally gave up the ghost: my 5-year-old flip-top cell, the one with that adorable little polar bear screensaver. You know, that cute little guy who comes out wearing the Jack-O-Lantern headmask, turning somersaults, reading his book, sitting & playing games, strolling while whistling, eating a hamburger, etc. I never knew what he was going to do next.
And now he's gone. For good, probably, since the old phone has been disabled. May he rest in peace...after all that time he spent entertaining me with his antics ~ he was so-o cute! O well...
Time for me to finally go high tech, hit the big time, take it a step further & do what I have been destined to do for a while now.
And now, I'm at a total loss.
My new phone/palm pilot/computer/mp3 player/TV-radio ~ yes, all this and more ~ I don't have the foggiest notion what to do with it!
This wonder of wonders comes with all kinds of attachments as well. Some things are pretty basic, like a home charger, a car charger, a set of earphones for listening to music or watching the TV...
Wait just a minute, there! Did I just say, "watching the TV"?? Why, yes, I believe I did! Will wonders never cease!?! My iPod has this feature, but only for purhcased movies & videos, not an actual TV that receives signals from the outside world.
Amazing!! I like that!
It also has the usual set-ups for connecting to my laptop, an extra leather case ~ and of course, I just had to have the two extra cases, didn't I? The black & the clear...
Not to mention the bluetooth earset ~ buy it now with the other gadgets & you get this amazing deal ~ if you wait til next week, buying it separately will cost you alot more! How could I say no?
But like Mike says, once you buy it, you have it...so I did! :) And if I have to talk while driving, which I hate, then at least I can do it without holding it to my ear, keeping my hands free to control the car! I believe that was the whole point?
But the absolute BEST part of it is ~ are you ready for this? It has no less than 3 how-to booklets ~ yes, 3! ~ one of which has 80 pages! I can't wait to sink my brain into that baby!! And a CD!!! Wow...life doesn't get any better than this! I am over the moon with rapture, with ecstasy, with pure unadulterated joy!
The only thing that would make me happier than I am at this very moment is if someone were to be scratching my back as I write this, lol.
But enough of this complaining...
I registered it with the company to enable my email account to be accessible right on the screen, without having to go through the web browser every time, and now, every time I get an email (which goes on all day long, for Pete's sake) it rings, buzzes or chimes. So, I am constantly picking it up to answer a phantom phone call, which turns out to be a sales email from Amazon, or my book club, or a friendly "hello" email from a friend. But phone calls? On a telephone? You're kidding, right?!?
So, this morning, since dear daughter Clare had a repair issue with her cell, I went into the store with her to have it checked out, maybe disable the email function, since I can go through the browser to check if I so choose ~ without all the bells & whistles ~ and I got the sales tech to show me a feature or two of how to use the Internet on this darned thing. But he didn't disable the email function! Maybe later, eh?
O yeah...and then there were the messages to the kids' phones, telling them that Mom got her new toy & she is still learning the ropes, so if anyone gets a mixed-up message, a missed call or anything meant for someone else ~ or if they simply want to call me & I can't seem to answer correctly ~ then they will know what is going on!
It took me forever just to figure out how to answer it without losing the call completely & even at that, I was dialing other people by mistake, whom I never even meant to call! My brother-in-law Tony is probably still laughing at me...he actually thanked me for the warning, saying he needed a good chuckle at the time. "Happy to oblige," was my response.
Meanwhile, my son-in-law Nick, who happens to be a whiz @ this sort of thing, has graciously volunteered to give me a crash course on BlackBerry handling, since he has had one for some time now. I trust him with anything technical; his advice has always been spot-on & he will be the one to get this all wrapped up nice & neat in my head.
Then, maybe if I'm lucky, I can leave at home my iPod, my Palm Pilot, my old cell phone...get a lighter wallet even ~ and not cripple my shoulder every time I have to pick up my purse to leave the house!
We'll see...
At least, not until they come out with something newer, better or shinier that catches my eye & my imagination!

Stuffed...

2009-03-01T12:03:00.000-08:00

My kids are all grown now, as anyone who reads this Blog regularly knows. But there was a time, years ago, when it seemed that they would never get to this point. The house was completely run over with Legos, Little People, crayons and bed friends.
One of the best bed friends that any of them possessed, in my humble opinion, was the "favorite animal." You know, as in Theresa and her elephants or Paul and his dragons.
Yeah, those bed friends...the ones that completely took over each and every bed in the house ~ except the one where Mike and I sleep. And that, I am sure, was just mere coincidence...if we had let them they would have taken over our space, as well.
Every year at Christmastime I would scour the toy stores and catalogs looking for the perfect additions to each collection, and sometimes it seemed to take months before each new member of the various menageries was found. I even had my sister Linda in on the act, for a few years, as she was totally into gathering Beanie Babies for her own daughter Amy. She would find extras for me and I would pay her back for her trouble ~ more than once driving over to her house, just to pick up that perfect turtle (Clare) or pig (Julia).
And that was just the tip of the iceberg.
Beanie Babies, fortunately, were relatively small, as bed friends go...there were many many that took up completely the corners of the beds to which they were assigned.
One year, when they were really young, I spent many late nights in a row, sitting up til all hours, stitching together two Care Bears (for Paul and Mary), because when money started getting tight, and the chosen characters were nearly impossible to find in the stores, I bought a pattern that showed all ten of the then-known "tummies" and went to work. Let me just say that "Birthday" and "Cheer" Bears never looked better than they did on that Christmas morning all those many years ago...
If I had a chance, I would love to go back in time and see just how many bed friends (and how much money, lol) I had spread about the house. I would be willing to wager that it would be at least a couple of hundred of them ~ when you multiply eight children and add up all the years they spent collecting them ~ yep, that's alot of animals!
Yesterday, Mike & I were walking through the grocery store & I paused when we came to a display of short, fat little animals ~ and wouldn't you know it, right up front, there were elephants & penguins...perfect for Theresa & Laura. Mike said, "Aren't you going to get some?" to which I replied, "They cleaned out their 'stash' a while ago, but if they were still collecting, I would absolutely do it!"
Now, as I move about, occasionally I will notice something that will bring these critters back to the forefront of my mind...as in the bunnies that live in our backyard, scurrying across the lawn, reminding me of Stephen's penchant for rabbits as a young boy. He has long since stopped getting worked up over every mammal sighted in the yard, but I still remember his reaction ~ and I always will.
When Mary was a baby, her Grandpa Andy bought her her first lamb ~ because as we all know, every Mary has a little lamb, right? And to this day, that lamb (even tho' she has acquired dozens of them since) holds a place of honor in her own home. This is the one that had fallen out of her crib one morning (as I recall @ about 7:00 *yawn*) and she climbed out of her "confinement", toddled into our bedroom, where I lay there fast asleep, and woke me up, angrily demanding why I had let "Lambie-Poo" sleep on her floor all night! Why wasn't I up already, putting it back into her crib?!? What was wrong with me!? So, of course, I dutifully crawled out of bed, went to her room, replaced the errant critter & then put my daughter back to bed, where she promptly fell back to sleep & I, her drowsy parent, was left wide awake, back under my own covers, staring at the ceiling ~ wondering why, if she had been able to crawl out of bed, was I forced to retrieve it? I guess a two-year-old has no sense of the obvious...
And then, we can't forget all the picnics & parties in the living room, now, can we? ...blankets spread everywhere, monkeys (Andrea), polar bears (Laura), you-name-its & every animal under the bright yellow sun, all there in that one space, dozens upon dozens of them...having a real jolly time...and of course, the kids enjoying it even more, lol.
There are so many memories of our little "zoo" here that I cannot put them all to words in this one simple post...but if I could, I would happily recall each and every moment as I sit here. I guess it only remains for the kids to take up their own individual favorites and keep their own recollections in their own hearts...and far be it from me to spoil the fun. ;)

A Quick Note...

2009-02-19T17:39:00.000-08:00

I don't know what is going on with Blogger lately, but it seems that comments are being posted to my Blogs (all 3 of them!) without my knowledge. I have only found them later, and been able to respond to all of my friends here...
I just want to thank one and all who have posted comments to me over the past month or two, when this first seems to have started. I don't know how it is, as I am shown on my Account pages as moderating all comments! It is not that I don't trust you all to leave kindly remarks ~ or at least polite ones, lol ~ but please bear with me if I don't answer in the first day or two.
Sometimes I come to my Blogs only a couple of times in a week, as I get busy with other things, or I might not be feeling especially inspired to write.
I do love each and every one of your observations, and I love to reply.
As soon as I can get this fixed, I intend to, believe me! I like to know when comments are being left for me, as I find it rude not to answer someone when they post a remark or question!!
Thanks for your patience... :)...and I send my Greetings to your Angels.

The Simplest of Beliefs...

2009-02-05T15:21:00.000-08:00

My grandson Andrew is nearly 10 months old, and a more beautiful, happy-go-lucky baby you will never see. Ever since he grew out of his colic (about 6-7 months ago) he has become so sweet & playful ~ always a joy to have around, learning new things every day, funny to a fault.
Here, he is pictured about 1.5 months ago, @ Andrea's house, right after cake & ice cream.
It's been so much fun being a grandparent, watching everything he does (or tries to do) and loving him to pieces...without the work of a parent, which I have had now for nearly 30 years.
He had the flu the other day, poor thing, but is now back to himself...so at least that's over! He was supposed to come over for the day, but wouldn't you know it, just when we get a chance to babysit, he gets sick! Of course, Paul had the same bug, so it must have been going through their house; Kristy had it just two days earlier.
But it did get me thinking: what about the other things in life, aside from the occasional flu bug or head cold, the things that loom and threaten in a more powerful way?!?
Remember when you were a small child & the whole world was a good place? ...where nobody was "the bad guy", ...where every day was a new adventure, a chance to play, discover, learn? ...where everybody was a friend to be made?
Remember when the worst things to worry about were getting home after dark, but there were no child molesters out there, no rapists or muggers? I can recall my Mom telling me that she felt entirely safe letting us play half a mile down the street, as long as "we stayed together"...but just "be home before the street lights go on!" The purity of the neighborhoods back then will probably never come back. The way one could trust a neighbor to look out for each other's property or children playing out on the front lawn, even ~ the simplest of times for the simplest of folks.
Of course, I worry about Andrew in the day-to-day goings-on of his life, but even more so do I worry about the grand scheme of things in his future. I worry about his education, his safety, his happiness ~ and any future goals he might have. Will he go to college? Will he find a "nice girl"? Will he stay true to the Church? Will he live to a ripe old age, enjoying his own children and grandchildren?
The simplest of beliefs "back in the day" was for parents, and then their children, all about getting a good job and "getting ahead"...but now, there is so much more, even than that!
Even tho' Andrew is my grandson, not my son, I still think about all these things. I hope and pray that he becomes exactly what God intends for him to become, keeping His will first in his life...and staying close to Him always.
Even besides all that, I hope for him also, on a more down-to-earth level, that he will do all the things that he sets for himself to do. Get a good job, find a nice girl, raise a family, enjoy his grandchildren someday, after I am gone...
The simplest of beliefs, to my way of thinking, still hold true even today. Altho' the world has changed in some ways, we still want the same things for our families that our parents wanted for us back then...happiness, health, love of God and others, a good life.
For Andrew, I wish nothing less...xo...

A Time to Mourn...and to Celebrate...

2009-01-15T11:42:00.001-08:00

My Mom, who passed away this past Saturday, 10 January, 2009, was a wonderful lady.
She will be missed by everyone who knew her; sadly, we cannot hold those we love in this life...they all must move on to that eternal destiny, which is called Heaven.
My Dad, who died on 8 November, 2001, was also greatly mourned by friends and family alike ~ and, I daresay, he still is. He & my Mom were married for just over 61 years. They had 6 children, of whom I was the 4th ~ 1 older son, 2 older daughters, 1 younger daughter & finally, 1 younger son.
We all grew up a close-knit family, with extended cousins and family friends to fill up any picnic area at any neighborhood park...Our family reunions took up any and all available space; favorite places included parks, beaches and even a couple of family summer homes.
My husband likes to tease me that whenever the family gets together, it takes up to an hour or more just to say "good-bye" at the end of any gathering...and I always respond with "Of course! That's just an extended part of the party! First, we say 'hello' for at least half an hour, followed by the party itself, and then, finally, the 'good-byes' start and can last up to any extended length of time ~ there is no limit to the gift of gab that has been bestowed upon my family, starting with my parents and their generation..." It has just always been a part of who we are!
There was no end to the good times enjoyed by my parents and their close friends...and I have no doubt that the fun continues in Heaven even now, as we who are left behind on Earth, grieve in our hearts for the ones lost to us. Of course, my parents brought us all up in the Faith of the Holy Roman Catholic Church, keeping us in parochial schools all the while, and showing a good example @ home of a life grounded in morals and sacrifice for others, but that always included a good word, a good deed and a good time ~ all was a blessed gift from God above! And they took full advantage of it, believe me...
I know we will all meet again one day, God willing, and our joy will be unbounded. There will be no end ever again for any of us, as we rejoice in lives well-lived and family well-loved.
God keep us all...

Lighting Up The Night...

2009-01-04T08:56:00.003-08:00

Every year, we have the same tree...this too-sparkly, too beautiful-for-words evergreen confection with loads of lights, icicles and hand-made ornaments that graces the corner of our living room. As a rule, I am in charge of the final touches, but the kids do all the rest ~ and that's just the way I like it.
So, on the first Sunday of Advent, Nick & Andrea came over before dinner and helped to bring all the tree parts, the boxes and the wreaths up from the basement ~ and by the time I arrived home after some running around, the tree was completely erected, adorned with white lights and garland. All we needed to do was add the fun stuff...and for a few days afterward we were busy adding all of the ornaments and jewels.
Today being the Feast of the Epiphany, or Little Christmas, I expect that soon we will be taking down this lovely creation and storing it away for the next Christmas Season. Oh, how I hate that! I do love my Tree and the way it lights up the entire corner of the house...
This year we even kept it simple and only put up the Tree, the Wreath that adorns the side wall over one of the sofas(pictured in my previous post below), and the Manger in the kitchen. This one is extra, having come to us from Mike's parents after they had passed away, so it is of great sentimental value; our main Manger scene ~ the one we bought for our own first Christmas ~ is on the shelf to the side of the living room, and every year there is a race to see who gets to lay the Babe in His crib @ midnight on Christmas Eve. Keeping it simple is fine, but I do regret that, for the first time in recent memory, nobody thought to add the frost to the mirror over the mantel...so that will have to go up as a reflection of the Winter outside the window, having nothing to do with the Season of Christmas itself.
And now, before we are beset with the onslaught of Spring showers, I do have to say that I am anticipating a good ice storm, just for the chance to prolong my love for the Winter sparkle and take my camera over to the park for some unforgettable Kodak moments.
To every Season, there is a reason for loving it...

Peace and Joy...

2008-12-25T07:14:00.000-08:00

I would like to post here a heartfelt "Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!" to all who come here...
May the Peace and Joy of this holy Season of the Birth of the Savior shower great blessings and grace upon everyone!

A Time for Flakes...and the Man Who Loved Them...

2008-12-19T15:23:00.000-08:00

I sure do love the snow. Even the kind that sticks to the ground everywhere, so much so that it takes two days to get back outside and go anywhere... There is just something so Nature-ific and majestic about it all, y'know? We had a real doozy of a storm around here last night ~ one that didn't actually end until this afternoon, somewhere between 3-4 pm. Lucky for me, I had a couple of errands to run that would not wait, so with the girls shoveling and scraping, I was able to venture out into the wild unknown...and it wasn't as bad as I feared it would be! So, all in all, as a die-hard snow bunny myself, from way back, I am pleased to announce that it was actually fun being out there... I read a book about a month ago about a man who was known the world over as the Snowflake Man, Wilson A. Bentley. He was a farmer in the late 1800's-mid 1900's, living in Vermont, sharing a house with his brother's family.
He did many things in his lifetime, not the least of which was play several musical instruments (mostly the piano), and work the farm with his brother. But his true love was the snow ~ from his earliest childhood days, all he really cared about was being out in the open air, collecting flakes on his photo-micrograph plate and taking pictures of his collection, as quickly as it would land, before it had a chance to melt.
I would love to post more about Bentley here, but for now, suffice it to say that he was a man after my own heart.
I can certainly empathize with someone who loves so dearly to be out, surrounded by Nature and all her magnificence ~ even to the point of tying a grasshopper to a flower overnight just so he could photograph it in the morning, covered in the dew!
Who else would have thought of such a thing?!?
By the time he died, Bentley was world-famous, but he never got rich from all of his work...not from his raindrops studies, not from his rock collecting and research, not from his musical ability...and most of all, not from the love of his life, snowflakes and all the finery of Winter.
He once said that he had spent more thousands of dollars on his passion than what he made (something over $4,000) but his true joy was sharing the beauty of Nature with as many people as he could possibly reach.
This he did, and he continues to do so even to this day.
As time goes on, I'm sure I will be posting about this man, all of his findings and most of all, his truly quirky character...he was surely one-of-a-kind. But for now, I am content to revel in the glories of my own personal Winter wonderland ~ and all the joy that goes with it!

Maybe, Maybe Not...

2008-11-29T19:36:00.001-08:00

Ok, so the winner is...tada! me? huh?!? According to the powers that be @ http://www.typealyzer.com , I am a "performer"...but maybe I'm not.

The analysis indicates that the author of http://jenn39.blogspot.com/ is of the type:

ESFP - The Performers

The entertaining and friendly type. They are especially attuned to pleasure and beauty and like to fill their surroundings with soft fabrics, bright colors and sweet smells. They live in the present moment and don´t like to plan ahead - they are always in risk of exhausting themselves.

They enjoy work that makes them able to help other people in a concrete and visible way. They tend to avoid conflicts and rarely initiate confrontation - qualities that can make it hard for them in management positions.

stronger on feeling/sensing side than thinking side

Why do I get different results on different blogs?
That means that you are not ABSOLUTELY stuck in a box (blink-blink)! How we write are affected by how we are feeling at the moment and how we see ourselves. We might think it is important to sound “serious” or “personal” - we might be under a lot of stress or feeling relaxed. This text analysis gives a snapshot by looking at the communication style of the text. Looking on the results over a period of time will give more confident results about how a blogger “normally” prefer to communicate.

Funny how every one of my Blogs says something different about me; at least two of them do ~ the third agrees with the second!

For example, I don't know how entertaining I am, but I do consider myself friendly, albeit still somewhat shy even from my childhood. I do plan ahead, but thinking about my plans can sometimes give me an over-stressed-out headache! Just ask my husband Mike...recently we switched our cable/Internet/phone service from Comcast to AT&T, and the entire "plan" kept me up for two nights, worrying about "all that hassle, is this the right thing for us to do, yadda-yadda..." but after it was all done, it was the easiest transition I have ever seen! The Internet is fine, the phone is fine, the cable TV, altho' new channel numbers are never fun to get used to, is fine!

But in light of this recent experience, I guess you could say that, to a point at least, I do NOT like to plan things ahead. Change makes me nervous, even sometimes depressed. Switching carriers is not exactly a cause to be depressed, but still...after nearly fifteen years?!? Definitely nerve-wracking...

I do have to admit that I enjoy being helpful; being a Christian I am a firm believer in the virtue of Charity ~ and I hope I practice it often!

As far as confrontation is concerned, I leave that to the more erudite among us...I hate an argument! With my asthma, I am fond of saying that life is too short and I refuse to waste my limited breath on fighting! Let the next guy take this one! Nope, not for me...I am much better at words on paper, or talking calmly to solve a disagreement ~ that is more my style.

So, all in all, even tho' this site tells me that I am "not stuck in a box, nor am I the same every day, with every Blog I write," I have to say that it is still me, nevertheless...so maybe this is me, and yet, maybe it is not!

A Family Gathering...

2008-11-27T19:50:00.001-08:00

There are many Sundays, especially lately, when our family gets together for an afternoon of dinner, visiting and simply enjoying each other's company...even more so now than when the kids were small, since when a family lives together, they go their separate ways after gathering @ the table, but once they are "out of the house" they visit purposefully for hours.

This past Sunday, for example, I had not seen our grandson for two weeks ~ and I was in serious "Andrew-withdrawal"...with all the symptoms that go along with it. I finally got to hold him to my heart's content and I enjoyed every minute of it!

He is nearly crawling now; no longer does he use his head as a fifth limb, but he does scoot from his tiptoes, or he will drag himself on his tummy. Either way, he gets where he is going...I can see it's time to baby-proof the house!

It seems that Sundays are also the perfect excuse to break out my camera ~ new family poses come to the fore at every turn. There are many hams in this group, lol...so there is plenty of fodder for the camera's eye.

Now that three of our children are out of the house, it seems that we look forward to Sundays more and more ~ it was never my favorite time of the week; after Mass, there was usually nothing too exciting to do. So, as a child, I found the greater part of the afternoon quite boring, actually.

But not anymore.

It seems that the day is now filled with more than our share of excitement ~ with weekly "company" arriving and staying for hours at a time ~ and as they leave, I find myself wishing they could stay for just a bit longer.

When they were small, Sunday dinners were a bit more "gathered" than the rest of the week, but still there was that time afterwards when one or more would have someplace they had to be, someone they had to see...

Now, I find that our house is the place that they have to be, that we are the ones whom they have to see, and it makes me remember years past with my own parents and how I was always looking for a time to visit with them.

Now, my Dad is gone and my Mom is in a home, no longer remembering most of her own family members...Oh, she does remember years ago, but to remind her of what she did or who she saw last week or even yesterday, she will gaze at you with that "look" and tell you that she has never done such a thing! I don't think she remembers all the Sundays we gathered at her table and visited for hours on purpose.

I wonder how long it will be before I am in her place? Will I remember all the times I hugged my children "good-bye! See you soon"?!?

It is hard enough these days to remember, without feeling a teary-eye, all the times when they were small and a simple hug was a daily ritual...when I would read them stories, tuck them in and close the light, peek in just before turning in for the night myself, rolling over with a groan when they came running in at the crack of dawn and jumped on the bed, waking us up too early?

How many times?!? I have no idea...I don't remember. I hope that I don't forget, however, that they did it in the first place.

And now, when I serve the vegetables at Sunday's family dinner, I am brought back to those days when just a couple of them (who shall remain nameless, lol) came up with the most brilliant schemes to get out of finishing their greens, just in time for ice cream! Of course, I would later find dried veggies stuck under their chairs or thrown away in the garbage when my back was turned.

I hope and pray that when I am in my mother's shoes I can remember that...it would be a shame to miss the memory.

As I look around the house I see all kinds of artifacts that were left here by those who have created, gifted and moved on.

I hope and pray that I will always remember who did what, who made what and who gave me what. That memory would also be sadly lost, if I did lose it.

Every time my family gathers for any reason, Sunday dinners being only one, I can feel the house picking up on the laughter, the tears, the hugs and kisses, and all the rest of the happy times ~ and sad ones, too ~ that are typically shared by a family that has been together for thirty years (and counting).

Yes, there is a great deal to be said for family gatherings. My family, for one, gives a real example of that reasoning every day.

I hope and pray that when I am old, gray and alone, I will always remember these times...it would be a great shame to miss all the memories ~ and all those family gatherings.

A Wife? or a Plaything??...

2008-11-07T19:20:00.000-08:00

When I was growing up, most children were taught morals and values ~ in other words, to become pregnant before marriage was a reason to feel shame, to be arrested was a cause of embarrassment.

Today, however, this is often not the case. And I can't help but think that it will get even worse before it gets better.

Celebrities in Hollywood are forever touting their illegitimate babies on their arms, boasting in the tabloids of how they are "so in love" with their significant others and that to be held to a "piece of paper" is the way of our grandparents, but not the way of the modern-day thinkers.

Horse manure.

The "way of our grandparents," Ladies and Gentlemen, is the "way of civilization" and by far the best way to be.

My husband is always telling our children (especially our six daughters) what a man looks for in a "plaything" vs what he might want in a "wife."

And, believe me, there is a world of difference.

When a young lady presents herself to the public eye as someone who is out there to get what she can from a young man, that young man who is attracted to her, thinking of all that he can get from her, finds a young lady who deserves exactly what she gets. And it is not often pretty.

Nowadays, fashions are more revealing than in days past because that is the way we are told by the designers that we must have them...but there really is another way!

A girl who wears low-cut and high-cut fashions is putting out the message that she is "easy" and wants nothing more than to be noticed by men as a "plaything"...and much to her surprise, she is treated as just that! Then, when she ends up hurt or pregnant, or many times in even more trouble, it can be too late.

Girls like this are often abused and forced into situations that they would have been better off escaping ~ but not always able to in the end.

When I see how my own daughters present themselves to the world, I am really proud to be their mother. Each and every one of them had taken to heart the lessons that their father and I have worked so hard over the years to instill into them ~ and it shows.

Our elder son has chosen for himself a wife who keeps herself as a wife should at all times. Our fourth daughter is recently married and does likewise.

The other six have not yet found their life-mates, but I feel confident that if it is meant to be for any of them, they will find someone who respects and values them as right-thinking individuals who were brought up to present a confident and wholesome face to the rest of the world...and who is proud to be decent and self-respecting. This, I am firmly convinced, will prompt them to have happy, fulfilling relationships with others that will afford them much happiness in the years to come...and to be God-fearing adults who will go on to instill into their own children the opposite values from Hollywood and anyone else who might come along with a so-called "better idea."

The time-tested and true way ~ that of our grandparents ~ is always the best way to be.

My Choice...

2008-11-04T18:49:00.001-08:00

Today, I voted. Pro-life. So there.

(Pictured above is the pro-life voter "sticker" that my daughter Andrea inked on my left hand after we left the polls today; we were supposed to get a sticker on our shirts, or so they said, but my daughter Mary was the only one who actually did, lol...so Andrea & I decided that we would wear our "banners" anyway!)

I am an unabashed, unashamed, unafraid pro-life mom of eight ~ with two more in Heaven. I have been reading and re-reading up on all that I could find "out there" on Barack Obama and John McCain...also a few of the third party candidates, Chuck Baldwin being the best.

This is my platform, my soapbox...and I intend to keep it that way. I can come to this Blog and write about whatever I like, and tonight, I choose to write about being a pro-life voter.

There is really nothing more I need to say here; all you readers know what it means to vote your conscience, and as a fully faithful, practicing Roman Catholic, I voted mine today.

Yes, today I voted. Pro-life. So there.

My story, and I'm sticking to it...

Another Memory, For What It's Worth...

2008-10-21T08:14:00.000-07:00

I was talking to my husband the other day about childhood memories. Suddenly I remembered that I had said I would post here about more things of my own and I have not done that, so for what it's worth *lol*, here goes...

When I was about 12 years old, my parents bought a bit of land on the Canadian side of Lake St. Clair, just across from our home in St. Clair Shores, MI. My Dad had always wanted his own "retreat" from civilization, where he could go to "get away from it all" ~ and my Mom went along with the idea, thinking how nice it would be to have a place where we could get all the fresh air and sunshine she was always touting as "good for the soul."

Now, don't get me wrong here ~ living where we did, there was more than enough sunshine and fresh air to go around; our neighborhood was, as I've stated before, quite rural and our house was only one of five on the entire block. The road was not paved, so that must give an idea of how often we had any traffic coming through...and the yards were huge! So, there was plenty of room for everybody and I had no complaints.

But to be in the presence of the lake shore, 24/7...now that was my parents' idea of Heaven on Earth!

Our property was not really directly on the shore of the lake, but on a canal that came inward, about 500 feet in. The canal stretched past us, home to several other cottage-dwellers, and around to a much bigger one, where there were more cottages and "sunshine and fresh air lovers" ~ just like my parents.

All in all, there were about 15-20 cottages in this little hamlet, and my parents, being the social lions that they were, made friends with all of them, lol.

Many of these families hailed from Michigan, just like we did, but there were a few who were actually Canadian...and there was even a family whose Grandparents were from Scotland! Oh, to listen daily to that wonderful brogue...the accent of my own ancestors.

Years later, when we had all grown up, many of these families were such good friends that they were invited to attend family functions even here back home; weddings and birthdays and bar-b-q's were common celebrations and the fun they all had together, you would have thought they were family themselves!

I don't know if it was the cottage atmosphere, where we all went to relax and play on the beach, but there was definitely something magical about that place and the people who stayed there. I don't recall one single incident in all the years we owned this little bit of "sunshine and fresh air" that would qualify as confrontational, angry, depressing or anything else that would come even close to the negative.

Of course, as the years went on, we heard about this one dying or that one being sick ~ and that was always very sad but it was also life ~ but on the whole, there was nothing but friendship and good will.

My Dad started out with a little 16' red runabout, that he would keep in the water at our dock @ the head of our property, and many evenings he and my Mom would take a beer and go out to the middle of the lake to watch the sunset. Or on clear days he would gather the entire family together and we would head out to a spot where the water would be about 4' deep (Lake St. Clair has many shallow places like this, even in the middle of it) and we would swim or water-ski for hours.

I even tried to ski once myself, but I'm afraid I was not too successful ~ I have never been an athlete, I'm afraid, because of my knees...so I mostly sat in the boat and watched for them to "go down."

Other times my sisters and our friends and I would go to the beach and swim in the whitecaps; omygosh, that was SO much fun! For hours and hours, we would let the waves crash upon us, carrying us in to the shore...My Mother would be watching from the window back at the cottage and praying that nobody would swallow too much water, lol, or drown themselves in the craziness of it all. But those days were the most fun and we never wanted them to end. At night, of course, we would all sleep like logs ~ feeling the waves beneath our mattresses as we drifted off to dreamland.

As the years went by, we visited that cottage by the lake so many times, I would not be able to count; sometimes we would stay for one or two days, sometimes my Mom would stay with us kids for weeks and my Dad would commute every evening from work in Detroit, as it was only about an hour's drive away, and then he would be able to stay there all weekend ~ at his favorite place in the world.

My Dad was a sailor at heart; he was in the Merchant Marine during WWII so he was used to being on the water...and to have his own cottage where he could swim and relax was a dream come true for him. To be able to share this all with his family must have made his life complete! Even at home in Michigan, we only lived about a half-mile from the lake, so we were able to go on rides on the water quite often, but our own boat, docked at our own cottage ~ now that, my friends, was the limit!

After the runabout started to wear out, he bought himself a pontoon boat, and it was aptly christened "The Queen." Then, for years, we enjoyed this bit of unusual boating pleasure...so much so that, when they finally had to sell the property that they had loved so much, my Dad could not bear to see it taken from the dock, so it was given to the new owner, who I am sure, probably has destroyed it by now!

We had that cottage on the canal for at least 30 years, perhaps a bit longer, but Canadian law states that anyone who owns property in Canada may pass it on to his children, but then it reverts back to the Province. Since none of us kids were in a position at that time to keep it up, my parents sold it to a very nice lady who re-furbished it and made it her permanent residence.

After a couple of years, they went back to see it and it was hardly recognizable ~ she had added an entire second story and re-modeled the inside ~ but it was still beautiful to my Dad.

Even tho' it was no longer ours, they were pleased to note that it was being taken care of with such tender affection ~ this woman had many friends and there were bar-b-q's held there all the time, lol...just like back in the old days.

So it was good to see that there was still plenty of "sunshine and fresh air" being enjoyed by all ~ and everything else "good for the soul."

The New Hat...

2008-10-04T10:20:00.000-07:00

There is something to be said for growing old...and yes, I am talking about becoming a Grandmother, lol.

Our daughter-in-law frequently stops by with our newest little one, Andrew, who, as it happens, has developed a strong affinity for his Grandpa Mike...and I couldn't be more thrilled about that.

He loves to sit on Mike's lap and gurgle about his day, his likes and dislikes, and even to the other day, when ~ as you can see ~ he came by to show off a new hat, given to him by his Grandma Cindy.

I understand that she had been to a sale and caught a glimpse of the deer & snowflakes, thinking of Andrew staying warm this coming Winter ~ his very FIRST ONE, yea! ~ and how this hat would bring out the deep blue of his eyes. The lining is as soft as velvet, and truth be told, it was not easy getting him to part with it inside the house, lol.

As Paul & Kristy continue to bring him over, week by week, and sometimes even more than that, thank God, I have been enjoying getting to know this little person, who has already familiarized his own self with our household ~ his personality, his temperament, everything about him ~ he has already become such a character in his own right that it is now hard to imagine our lives without ever having a chance to know him. It really does seem like he has been around forever...and it is barely six months since his birth.

Soon I know it will be time to "baby-proof" the house, with light socket covers, locks on cupboard doors, gates at the stairways, and all the rest of that, but until then, it has become very easy to have him around. Yes, even second-nature to have him around; we have been so busy getting to know him that for myself, at least, I don't remember what it was like not knowing him at all.

Last year, on my birthday, Paul & Kristy gave me a card that read "Happy Birthday, Grandma!" and that was how I found out. I have known Andrew ever since that day, more than a year ago. I have watched and waited for his arrival, counting the days probably as expectantly as Kristy herself! I have sympathized with her every ache and pain, wanting to feel his kicks and be there during his visits to the doctor, when every ultrasound picture showed him with a thumb's-up signal from inside the womb.

And now, months later, as I see him in pictures like these, sitting on his Grandpa's lap & telling him all about what he has been up to since his last visit, my heart is filled with a joy that only a Grandma can feel. The son of my son, the closest being to my own that there ever will be...that is what I feel, and what I want; for Andrew, in his new hat, I can only say that my love for him will grow every day, for the rest of my life, and how happy I am for the chance to call him one of my own.

Priming the Marriage Pump...Words of Wisdom from a Wise Woman...

2008-09-26T10:25:00.000-07:00

I don't usually do this, but I am going to take advantage of the link on Dr. Laura's Blog that allows me to embed her video into my own Blog here...words of wisdom about keeping the romance in a marriage:

In Flight...For Me?

2008-09-23T17:02:00.000-07:00

There are reasons that anything might come to us during our lifetimes. One is because God wills that it should happen and thus, it does.
Then there is that other way that, although I am a firm in His Design, I cannot but wonder if my life is taking a curious turn here and there ~ all along the way to the ending, wherever and whenever that may be.
I have been noticing of late that, even though it is the end of Summer/beginning of Autumn, the butterflies are more profusely in my line of sight than they have been all season...and I can't help but wonder "why?" Of course they are busy about the flowers, gathering strength for their migratory flights, but even more than that, never have I seen so many, all different varieties, crossing my path as I travel along the road. We have not noticed any more butterflies in the gardens than usual ~ as a matter of fact, they seem to be following the paths and roadways even more than the flowers these days! Perhaps they are busily mapping out travel routes? Let's see...which way South, hmm-mm-m...?
For the past three weeks, every single day, I have been confronted with at least one, sometimes two, even occasionally three butterflies ~ at various intervals ~ flitting into view, crossing the road right in front of us as we drive along, usually on our way out to our daily breakfast.
I said to my husband Mike that there is something going on here; perhaps a sign from my Muse? lol...I don't really know why, but for whatever reason, I am seeing this all over the place!
Our daughter Theresa agrees with me. She tells me that she herself was confronted by a small yellow fluttering fellow, as she was walking along on her way home from Mass this past Sunday. It kept her company for the distance of three houses ~ and these houses are not close to one another, either!
"This is a sign," she told me. "My favorite color? Following me, only me..."
I'm beginning to think she might just have a point there!
Yesterday, as we sat in our booth at one of our favorite breakfast "haunts" I remarked to Mike that I had just realized, while sitting there, that I had not noticed any butterflies crossing our path that morning and I was actually disappointed, bordering on worried...
But then, as I gazed out the window, I spotted one, fluttering across the parking lot, on his way to whatever engagement he was pressed to attend.
"There he is!" I exclaimed.
"Who?" Mike queried.
"My daily dose of flutterby!" I replied, exasperated that he did not catch on immediately. "I was wondering if I was going to spot one today; I always see one in front of the car as we move along ~ you know that! I find myself looking forward to it..."
"Well, I am very satisfied for you, Jenn," he smiled as he sipped his coffee. "I know how much the butterflies mean to you. Are you happy now?"
I snuggled down into my seat, held my coffee with both hands and blew into the warmth of it all.
"Yes," I answered. "I am. Very much so."
And I lived contentedly to blog another day...

Not A Compliment!

2008-09-16T19:50:00.000-07:00

What follows here is a letter that I felt compelled to write to the "Powers-that-Be" @ our local college, where several of our children attend classes:
To Whom It May Concern:
I was at the Center campus library "turnaround" this evening about 9:30 and a police officer in a van pulled up and told me that I was not allowed to park there, even though I was NOT PARKED...my car's engine was obviously running and I had my hazard lights flashing. There is a sign there that says "no parking" but I am under the impression that "standing in a running car" does NOT constitute parking!
Also, he was very rude when he told me to move and when I told him I was only waiting for my daughter, who was to be coming from the library, he told me to move and that she was to wait for me, I was not to wait for her!
First of all, who is he to decide what I do for my children and how dare he tell me to move when I was NOT doing anything illegal?
I did not get his name or badge number, nor the number of his van, but I would be willing to bet that, just before this happened, he was the same man who had pulled over another driver in the campus "circle drive" on the other side of the library...so afterwards he would have had time to come up behind me. The timing was just too coincidental...and I'd bet that you could identify him by this.
My daughter is a young woman of class, not some street hooker who is accustomed to standing on street corners in the dark of the night, alone, just waiting for anyone to happen by...and I can guarantee you that if she were to come outside to see that I was nowhere in sight, she would go back inside and wait until I pulled up!
I am a law-abiding, tax-paying citizen and I do not expect, nor do I deserve, to be treated like I was a law-breaker. I was NOT doing anything wrong by waiting there, with the car ON and my lights flashing so anyone could see me there and pull around if they needed to...and if an emergency vehicle were to come through, I would be more than capable of pulling out of the way, because you see, as I said I WAS NOT DOING ANYTHING ILLEGAL OR WRONG. And I WAS NOT PARKED!
People sit there all the time waiting for students to come out of buildings and I daresay that there are many other things he could have been doing, rather than throwing his weight around bullying those of us who are simply trying to get our children home safely at night.
My daughter was just telling us the other day that she is very uncomfortable there alone at night, and now I know why...these so-called officers are not there to enforce the law ~ they are there to harass innocent people.
By the way, where was this "officer of justice and law" when I pulled out of the campus a few minutes later, my daughter safely in the car with me, and there was a car, blocking a DRIVING LANE, not a thought to others coming up from behind?!? Hmm-mm-m????
Just curious...
I must say that I was quite upset when I first came home (with Julia) and I am most curious to see if I get a response...I doubt it.

A Moment of Bonding...

2008-09-08T07:04:00.000-07:00

My husband Mike has been home from work (due to illnesses) since June, 2005, and was finally officially retired in January, 2008.

As he has gotten his health under better control and is feeling better these days, we have gotten into the daily habit of eating out ~ usually breakfast, sometimes lunch and occasionally, dinner.

The kiddos are all old enough now to butter their own bread, so to speak, so we don't always feel that we have to stay home and cook ~ and these daily outings have become a real occasion of bonding between us.

We used to do this quite often when we were first married and yours truly was a non-cook, but as time went on and I had baby after baby, we had less resources for such self-spoiling activity. And I, of course, went on to become a gourmet chef...er, umm-m...at least good enough to tell baking soda from baking powder...long story, don't ask...

Anyway, we finally have arrived at the point in our lives when, with three of our brood out of the house, and the other five sometimes cooking for themselves at all times of the day, with their various differing schedules, we can do what we like. We do eat dinner at home with the family most evenings, but to be able to go anywhere we like for our morning meals ~ and occasionally, evening ~ is something that we would be hard-pressed to give up.

There really is something so relaxing about being retired; he tells me all the time that I am retired too ~ and I like the feeling.

I must say, however, that as my regular readers know, I dearly miss the days when my children were under my feet all day (and half the night, lol) but that's just not how life works forever...we cannot hold onto the past at every moment of our lives. So, there comes that time when we face the fact that we, too, are older and ready for the next phase...namely, retirement.

And eating out whenever we feel like it.

I have to add that every day now, since we started this whole thing, I look forward to the time of day when we pick out the restaurant of the day (place du jour, anyone?) and get in the car and GO!

It may seem like a small thing to some people ~ I'm sure there are many out there who have been doing this for years ~ but I am not one of them, ok?

And to sit and look at my beloved over coffee every morning is a real treat to a wife whose husband has been leaving the house every morning @ 3 for nearly all of the 35 years he worked. I grew used to getting up in the morning alone, quietly making the coffee for myself, getting the kiddos out the door to school, starting my daily chores...and then looking forward to his arrival at the end of his day.

But not, as it turned out (like any other Mom) not the end of mine...and then as he had to rise at the crack of dawn, back to bed so early, while I was doing the Mom-thing until well past dark.

So now, as I look at the days and nights of my present life, I think we have arrived at a place where we fully deserve to be. We deserve to spend hours each week, just sipping our coffee and sitting face-to-face in cozy booths in our favorite restaurants, mulling our decisions over how to have our eggs prepared, and talking in low tones about the life we have had ~ and continue to have ~ with one another.

Who knew, eh? ...back then, 31 years ago, saying our vows before God and company, what the future held for us? What were we giving up and what were we gaining?

I'll tell you one thing: I have gained everything I ever set out to gain, for myself and for the people I love the most in this world.

Eating out, as simple as that is, is a big deal to me, to us. It has come to symbolize the life we share, the moments we talk and laugh together, sharing our stories and our thoughts with each other, praying that, God willing, it can continue for many more years.

You just never know, I realize that ~ but to have it now is a real treat.

And this is a very sweet, sweet dessert, indeed.

Quotes to Remember...or Not.

2008-08-31T13:04:00.000-07:00

There is something so sweet about remembering what our children said so long ago and how they would be perceived now if they came up with the same quotes.
For example, my daughter Julia, a very funny child, full of one-liners herself...and even today she comes out with things that I cannot believe what I am hearing, except that I have known her for nearly 22 years ~ so it should not be any surprise to me.
The other day she was talking with her cousin Amy, who is about a year younger than she is and who has been a lifelong friend to her and our daughter Clare.
As Amy was turning to leave, Julia said to her, "You smell like childhood."
What?!
A compliment, that...and hopefully Amy took it as one. I would have to say that I would, remembering back to all the times they shared way back then and right up til today.
Another time, dear daughter Julia was heard to remark to a stranger on the phone, "My Mommy's not here right now, can I take a shower?"
Again, huh?!
Truth be told, lest anyone think that I had left my children alone in the house, Julia was being watched by her older sisters and had gotten to the phone before they had a chance to respond to the ring. I was in the shower, honest! But I think she was so excited to get to the phone before anyone else, she just blurted out her own version of the prescribed message before she had a chance to actually think first what she was saying!
My daughter Mary, on the other hand, has always been the one in total control ~ of her well-chosen words (in her own mind, at least), her opinions and her sense of self. If one asked her what was the difference in pronouncing a word "pot-A-toe" or "pot-AH-toe" she would tell the person in no uncertain terms the correct method. As a matter of fact, to illustrate her self-assured manner, both in vocal skills and in nearly everything else, a favorite quote (Mary style) is "Well, the tom-AH-toe people are wrong!"
Ok, according to whom, eh? Again, God love her, that's Mary...since she was a youngster, being 27 now, she has been one who knew what she wanted, always had a plan, and went after ~ and accomplished ~ everything she set out to do.
And then, there's our Clare, with always a hearty laugh for anything that tickles her fancy...and her funny bone. Once, when I had come in to the house after an afternoon in the hot sun and up to my knees in dirt in the backyard gardens, she pronounced, "Mom, anyone can tell just by looking at you that you have just spent the afternoon playing with the Faeries!"
Very true...she remembered, I am happy to see! The happiest part of any day in the garden is always spent with the Faeries' help, I like to say.
Or about the other day, as she was sitting talking with her father and me, something came up in the conversation where she was apt to respond, "Well, I never knew that, until I found out!"
OK...come again?!?
So glad that you know it now...
Anyway, as it goes, I sometimes wish I had been carrying around a tape recorder all these years, just so I could record and remember everything my children came up (and out) with! Thankfully, many things stand out in my memory and I have to smile every time one of them pops into my head.
I'm sure any Mom reading this can relate to that, but even more, just waiting until they are older, and the family jokes and quotes take on a whole new sweetness ~ and comic relief...

A Memory for a Friend...

2008-08-28T05:40:00.000-07:00

A dear friend of mine, who lives in Sri Lanka, once told me that she comes to my Blogs but is somewhat surprised to find that there are very few entries about my childhood. We have been exchanging stories over the past few months and her memories of her own early times are sweet, funny and captivating.
She tells of games made up with her friends, pranks pulled and scrapes that left minor scars ~ and I'm sure that any of us reading this can relate to all of that!
Nowadays, we both agree, children are not always allowed to use their imaginations, much to my own dismay...being an Artist all my life I have wonderful recollections of made-up stories that I lived out, Faerie Tales that came true and the Muse that I have always followed in my own life. It would certainly have been a shame if I had not passed this on to my own children, and looking back on their younger days I can safely report that I did just that. Their own memories are happy ones indeed ~ and not all filled with Nintendo and PlayStation, reality TV or boring Anime.
I promised my friend that I would begin writing more of my own memories here in this Blog, and today is the first day of more of that...
As I sit here thinking of all that I can remember, so many times of my life come flashing before my mind's eye, and I cannot choose just one to write about. There is a general idea that I would like to get across, tho', so I think I'll just start with that.
We live in the suburbs of Detroit, MI, and parts of our neighborhood are quite rural. As we drive along, I like to observe what is "out there" (when I'm not the driver, of course, lol) and one thing that always fascinates me is the old farm equipment that people have adapted to decorate their property. There is one old house nearby that keeps an old water pump and a wagon-type trailer in the front yard, repainted in bright colors and no longer in practical use...but their very presence brings to mind old-time images of days gone by when such implements were considered necessities.
My old backyard had a wagon-trailer just like the one in this yard ~ painted dark green and fitted with two giant wheels, one on each side, a long hook-up handle in the front for connecting to the back of a car. My Dad kept it on the side of our old one-car garage and my Mom kept it "off-limits" to our play. Of course, we paid no attention to that rule! Daily, five of us would climb into it (there were six of us children in the family) and one would remain stationed at the front end.
When everyone was safely inside, being careful not to scrape arms and legs (the wood was not sanded ~ just painted), we would all huddle at one end. The person on the outside would then tip the wagon to the other side and we would all go tumbling and sliding down to the down-turned end, laughing and falling over each other as we went.
Unfortunately, however, the bad part was that the non-sanded wood of the wagon would tend to leave slivers in anyone's skin who was not safely covered up; sadly for yours truly, there was more than one occasion when this was the case...but it never stopped me from doing it again the very next day.
As you can well imagine, my Mom was never happy with us whenever she could catch us playing in this old trailer and finally, to her own delight, my Dad decided at last to re-do the entire yard.
He had crews come in to install a brand new chain-link fence, a new 2.5 car garage and a brand new driveway to match...and that was the sad end to our trailer. My Mom made sure that it was taken away, never to be seen again. We do, however, have pictures of the old garage being hauled away down the unpaved street that was the path to our fantasies of so many years ago.
When the men were laying the groundwork for all of these new goodies, which of course included brand new sod and garden space for flowers, they put down stakes and string for leveling the yard and this was what gave my parents the idea for a brand new brainchild that would go on to become the source of unlimited pleasure for many more years of playtime fun.
A GIANT SANDBOX!!!
What could be more inspirational than that!?
How wonderful, how magical, how incredibly FUN!!!
And that was how we ended up with the best backyard in the entire neighborhood...a huge play area that my Dad told the crews to leave filled with sand...about ten x twenty feet in diameter, and extending even further back behind the garage.
He later told us that the idea had come to him as he watched us out there playing in all that sand while the men were busy elsewhere, and when it was time to leave certain areas so they could lay sod, cement, or whatever, we would very reluctantly get up and leave our "playground".
Of course, part of our new sand box was taken up by the brand new swing set ~ *grin* ~ but who could resist such a yard as this, eh?
Not me...
And even today as I remember all the good times we had back there, safely under my Mom's watchful gaze, I wish I could go back to the "wonder" that was our backyard. I am now and will always be grateful to my parents for allowing us to exercise our imaginations when we were children. It was by far the best childhood that I could have ever wanted.
Every boy and girl should have the same magic...

Links to My World...

2008-08-27T20:39:00.001-07:00

Ok ~ what the heck...
I have this same link on my Catholic Blog and I figured, why not? :)
So, here it is...explaining that if you click on any of my pictures in the sidebar (except for family shots) it will take you somewhere.
I am not giving away any secrets, mind you, but sometimes it's fun to get to know somebody by what they think is important to them, n'est pas?
Try it ~ you might like it, lol...

Hello, Good-bye!

2008-08-24T17:33:00.000-07:00

So... There it is, all of my entries from my Yahoo 360 Blog to my General Blog here on Google's Blogger! And all I have to say about that is, WOW! Talk about your busy afternoon... Also, I have added all comments that were made to each post, so nothing is lost there, either. I am going to post here the URL for the General Blog @ Yahoo 360, along with adding the URL to my last entry there, so the two will be cross-referenced for as long as anyone cares to check.
http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-4sDD4m0mc6_URmcrf8rXBKhZOgtimL0-?cq=1
And now, my final adieu to Yahoo 360 ~ it's been nice, but there have been so many issues of late (lost avatar, lost posts when edited, lost count, etc.) that I can barely stand it there anymore! So, Google ~ here I am, again! This time, for good...
(Here is the last post I left there, so anyone who comes to that page will be able to find me here from now on:)
Well, I have finally 'had it' with Yahoo 360 ~ too many issues that are never resolved, so I have decided to move this Blog over to Google's Blogger, where I have my other two Blogs (Catholic and Artist) and where there has never been any problems.
So, anyone who comes here to read up on my life (and my musings, lol) you can keep up with what's happening if you would kindly click here:
http://jenn39.blogspot.com/
I have moved all of my posts from here to there, so nothing is lost, including any and all comments from loyal readers...there will be a completed move in one or two more days, just as soon as I can get my Blog Roll up over there and a couple of minor things, and that will be that!
I have tried to tell the good folks here @ Yahoo 360 about avatars that don't work, lost counts, pages that will NOT load (busy servers? Hello~ this is 2008, y'know! ), and if I preview a post I do NOT expect to LOSE IT!!!
Thank-you, Yahoo 360, for never resolving any of these issues, but I am done.
(Just a note here on my Google Blog page, my total count @ Yahoo 360 up til now was 1845. And now I am installing a new Stat Counter to keep track on this page from now on.)

Entry for August 17, 2008 ~ Harried, Housewifely...??

2008-08-24T11:30:00.000-07:00

A Group to which I belong here on Yahoo for Stay at Home Moms (Catholic) is always getting into these discussions about whatever-you-like...

And this week? One member said that she had been listening to a program where they were belittling stay-at-home parents. (So what else is new?) ...but how come the outside world does not perceive us as valuable, contributing members of society? Why do "they" talk down to us as if they were any more educated or even more "street smart" than we are? How dare they?!?
Do they know that we are just as good at what we do as they are?
For myself, I do not head a major world corporation, but I do head a family...with my husband of 31 years, eight underling members included. We co-ordinate daily activities just as if we were running a multi-billion dollar industry.
We have appointments, arrangements for major family events, day-to-day work and school schedules, life-saving medical schedules, Church-related hours, college degrees, and everything else they do.
We must be here and there, doing this and that.
Another member of the Group actually did the math and figured that we deserve a salary per year of at least $70,000, considering our daily duties of maid, cook, nurse, chauffeur, wife, mother, teacher, and more! Well, that's wonderful and all, but I don't see us getting paid anytime soon, do you?
I have raised eight tax-paying citizens for the greatest country in the history of mankind. I have seen them go from completely Mommy-and-Daddy dependent bottle suckling, diaper-messing babies to full-grown, college-educated, law-abiding members of this so-called civilized society of ours...and for what? To hear that, even after over 30 years of hard work, prayers and worries, that they do not have a Mother or Father who contributes?
This is (pardon me) bulls**t.
Period.
My husband has worked for 35 years at the same job, to be retired now. And I am still at it. We are both stay-at-home now, and that's fine with me, thank-you very much for nothing. It's the way we were meant to be and our entire family is all the better for it.
Not one of our children has ever been in prison, violent, disobedient, drug-abusing or runaway. Not one of them would tell you that they feel cheated of anything just because one or both of their parents was anything different than what they were ~ and are!
I dare anyone on this radio program to stand before me and tell me to my face that my life has been wasted, even with my degree in Fine Arts and Education, and what have I ever done with that, eh? Lots, I can tell you! ...with eight children, are you kidding me?!?
I have had the book learning and probably would have been fine working in the corporate world. But what I gave up and what I missed along the way ~ this was nothing.
All the memories and learning I have had for these past 30+ years I could not replace, not with anything "they" could throw at me, not for a million years. The wonderful man to whom I have pledged my life is the first and greatest blessing who has ever crossed my path, and it has been my privilege to love him. The children with whom God has deigned to grant me have been nothing but utter and complete delights ~ every one of them.
And I will go to my grave saying so.
By the way, Uncle Sam, you owe me $2,170,000. Small bills, please.

Entry for August 13, 2008 ~ Too Much But Not Too Soon!...

2008-08-24T11:29:00.000-07:00

Well, I hope I haven't gone and done it!
For the past six months (nearly) I have been sitting around, bemoaning the state of things around here...even tho' I had the kids all helping out and believe me, they did! ...but there were certain things that still needed to be done.
The various chores around here got done in sporadic fashion because everyone ~ but yours truly ~ has a life.
I know when I first broke my leg, I blogged that I was actually looking forward to sitting and drawing, reading, playing on my laptop ~ and all the rest of it. I am a sit-around type at heart anyway ~ always have been. But I don't let that stop me from cleaning my house or taking care of chores about the property, for heaven's sake!
So, with my nearly-healed leg, and the $2000 Rainbow vacuum that I had to have fixed , I decided that today would be the first of my "back-to-work" days. I decided to take the living room apart, ceiling to floor, and made sure that every nook and cranny got the attention that it deserved.
And the family has been complimenting me all evening on the state of affairs here...but there is a small problem that I hope won't become a major one!
You see, I have a very bad back. I've had this for as long as I've had children ~ going on 30 years now. I have sciatica and three crushed vertebrae. So, am I supposed to push furniture around and climb up on chairs to reach high corners, knick-knacks on shelves, etc.?
Hardly...
But that's what I have been doing. All day.
And now I sit here, writing this post and feeling like I've been through the mill.
So, guess what I am planning for tomorrow?
Yep, taking care of my sore aching back...get me the heating pad and a good book!
Because I am not cleaning another entire room til next week......

Entry for August 11, 2008 ~ Frustration...

2008-08-24T11:28:00.000-07:00

My current mood...
Frustration with myself and a situation currently in my life!
Not my family, oh no ~ they are great, thank-you very much. I get along wonderfully well with my husband and children; all is fine on that front.
What I am talking about is this darned website, the one we know as Yahoo 360!
I have tried to find the answers to problems in the Help pages, only to meet with dissatisfaction and yes, frustration!
I have written to the Powers That Be @ Yahoo, only to meet the same.
I cannot find answers to simple questions concerning the hold-up with my own avatar, why it doesn't show and why, when I try to save a 'favorite' or edit my personal photos, it disappears, and also, the entire page ~ unless, of course, I delete said avatar!
When will the good folks @ Yahoo come to my aid?
They write back and tell me that I must wait until all updates are completed and all bugs are eradicated.
Fine.
Well, Yahoo, that's been done and I'm still waiting...
Still waiting here...
Waiting...
Ok, maybe I'm done waiting. Maybe I will just delete the stupid thing and keep to actual photos!
At least, they cannot delete my family!!!

Entry for August 08, 2008 ~ A Disclaimer...of sorts...

2008-08-24T11:26:00.000-07:00

Well, here we go again...when will we ever learn?!?
The other day I was asked by an Internet friend to check out the Blog of a friend of hers, not naming any names here, who was being attacked from the "blogosphere" by a total, bitter stranger. So I did.
And what I found there was not good.
This woman had posted on her own Blog about NFP, or Natural Family Planning. There were several people who commented, telling her that they liked what she had written, had learned from it, or simply agreed with it.
And then there was another woman, a total stranger, who came in and belittled her, attacked her and abused everything she said, using derisive language the entire time. This woman claimed that, since she was from an older generation, that this gave her the right to dictate what others should write about in their own "personal space" ~ so the one to whom the Blog belongs, in rebuttal, went on to publish a disclaimer for herself and for anyone who comes to read what she writes.
I thought this was a wonderful idea, and I am hoping she will not mind if I copy her efforts...after all, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, is it not?
And so, to all of the few readers who come to my Blog here @ Yahoo 360, and also to those who move on to read also what I write in my two Blogs @ Google's Blogger, I have this to say:
I hope you enjoy what I write. I hope you might even take something from it and apply it to your own lives. I hope you know that this is my own "personal space" and as such, it is mine to write and present in any manner I wish.
I promise I will not ever write anything derogatory about anyone here, or there, and will never use vulgar or abusive language ~ unlike some I could name.
I will write about my family, my Faith (in Holy Mother Church) and anything else I care to explore. I will give away some of my own deepest and personal thoughts and feelings here, and there, and I hope you know that you read them of your own free will. I do not force you to come here, nor do I force you to stay.
If you care to leave comments, I welcome them ~ I encourage them, in fact. All I ask is that you keep them civil and charitable. If you care to email me privately, that's fine too.
But I sincerely hope that you will not expect me to add my own "head in the sand" view of the world to yours. This is where I vent, rave, weep, share, laugh and live. And my opinions and comments are my own. I do not apologize for anything I say here, and I do not expect to be harassed or threatened at any time. Like the ostrich, my world is my own ~ and you are welcome to join in or leave.
If you agree with this disclaimer or not, that is not my concern. I only post this so anyone who does come in here will not be too surprised at what they find, nor at my lack of concern at such surprise.
Peace, everyone......

Entry for July 28, 2008 ~ For A Lifetime...

2008-08-24T11:24:00.000-07:00

Even tho' I have eight children, two more in Heaven, I am torn each day...now that three of them are out on their own in the world.

Paul, the eldest, is married and has been for nearly two years, with a three-month-old son. Mary, the eldest daughter, is a proud homeowner also; she has her own condo, and is an accountant. Andrea, our fourth daughter, was married two weeks ago and she and her new husband live about a mile away.
That's it for the "out of the house" children...and then there are the five still here with us.
Theresa & Laura, just one year younger than Mary, are in school, working in a Celtic gift store, and keeping busy with their lives, doing alot of volunteer work on the side, as it comes along. Clare, just younger than Andrea, is in school also, full-time and helps out in the same store where her older sisters work. Julia, our youngest daughter, is also in school and works in a department store. Stephen, the youngest of all, is a full-time student and works for the utility company part-time. None of these jobs reflects what each is studying, but at least they help with tuition and books, lol...
So, all in all, the children have all turned out well...each has a life, each contributes to society in the way that suits them best. Each is a loving, intelligent, Christian Catholic, sweet person ~ and yet, as it never ceases to amaze me, each is a totally different personality than the next one. Even the twins are complete opposites in many ways, as much alike as they are in others.
Their father and I have invested nearly 30 years of our lives in their upbringing and education, praying for and guiding them on their way to adulthood. There have been up times and down times, to be sure, but nothing like what I might see on a TV reality show ~ who needs that??!
The way some people raise their children is unthinkable to me, sometimes...I see how they are neglected, abused, endangered even. I think about my own and I want to cry.
I miss the ones who have left every day...I cry in my heart for them being gone. Luckily, they all live nearby so we see them often, talk often on the phone, visit with our grandson often ~ he is such a dear heart ~ and keeping up with their lives is such an ongoing treat...I will enjoy what I can get out of the experience...for a lifetime.
The ones who still live here at home are all busy, so there are alot of times that the house is completely quiet. That is the way of life, and I thank God every day that we have been allowed to live long enough to see them all grow up...but when they are home, I have to admit, are the happiest times for me.
I have gotten so used to the noise of a big family that I am having a hard time with the quiet ~ the "sounds of silence," as it were...like in an earlier post here I remember saying that the house was completely empty one evening except for the two of us, me & Mike, and it was almost eerie.
As much as we love one another ~ and we truly are attached at the hip ~ I feel a change in our life. Some things change, some things don't and all things we cannot help. In my heart I still count to eight, I cannot help that. Is this how it was for our parents? Years ago when we ourselves first left? Did they hurt inside? Did they feel lonely or sad? Did they keep the doors to our old rooms closed so they could pretend that the children would once again be inside?
Or did they understand that life goes on and we were only doing what God had intended for us to do all along? To fly from the nest and begin the life that was meant to be...for a lifetime?
I chose this picture to illustrate this entry because Mary and Andrea shared a room for the past seventeen years. When Mary left, it was strange enough...but Andrea was still here. Mary was thrilled to have her own place and she is doing great there.
As we watched the date of Andrea's wedding fast approaching, we knew it was only a matter of time. Now that time is here. She is happy with her Nick and we couldn't be happier for her! He is a wonderful young man and head over heels in love with her.
But as our children leave us, one by one, we will continue to see the changes in our lives. They will probably go on to get married ~ at least a few of them will ~ and we will see the addition of many more grandchildren ~ or at least, I pray that we will.
In the meantime, I will enjoy the time we have left with them. I will relish all the memories and the possibility of more.
The two girls in this picture, as they represent Mary and Andrea sharing time together, will later come to mean the others to me...Clare and Julia, Theresa and Laura. Sharing rooms, memories and lives ~ until the time finally comes for each to move on...
And the times of their childhoods will always be a part of what we hold in our hearts...for a lifetime.

Entry for July 27, 2008 ~ You May Quote Me...

2008-08-24T11:23:00.000-07:00

I know I already posted about my all-time favorite actor, Cary Grant, but I do have other favorites, nearly as high on my scale of one to ten as he was, and one of them here, James Stewart, had quite a repertoire himself.

There were so many movies, all great, that I can barely begin to list them all, and to love the old black&white flicks as I do is a real blessing ~ it makes the older actors of Hollywood so available to a person who loves movies as much as I do.
James Stewart was accomplished in both drama and comedy, with his dry wit, self-effacing manner and dead-pan delivery ~ his way of getting even the most skeptical observer on his side by the end that would make even a non-movie person (like my husband Mike) a truly dedicated fan.
Jimmy Stewart was born in Indiana, PA, in 1902. He actually started out to become an architect (excelling at airplane design and winning a scholarship) but was drawn to acting at Princeton University (joining the famed Triangle Club) and later, as he became known in Broadway plays, finally making his way to Hollywood...there he left his mark in many different types of films.
As he was in his movies, he was most likely in his real life ~ also gaining the rank of Brigadier General in the US Air Force. By the time he died, in 1997, he had attained the prestige of being named the third greatest actor (as listed by the American Film Institute), after Humphrey Bogart and Cary Grant ~ grand company indeed ~ and had won at least two Oscars, one for a movie, one for lifetime achievement.
As far as my own favorite Stewart movies, I hardly know where to begin: "Harvey" is probably my all-time favorite, followed closely by "Mr. Smith Goes to Washington," "It's A Wonderful Life," "Rear Window," and "The Man Who Knew Too Much."
In his classic "Harvey" Stewart plays Elwood P. Dowd, a kind-hearted man who is befriended by a 6-foot-tall invisible (but very wise) Rabbit, one who tells him that his name just happens to be his own favorite name ~ Harvey. The two become the best of friends, and Harvey does not leave his side from that moment on...except for a brief sojourn with another man who can also see him, yet loses his company when Harvey decides that he "prefers Elwood."
One of my favorite quotes of all time comes from the scene, when Elwood explains, ''In this world we must be oh, so smart or oh, so pleasant...well, for years I was oh, so smart, but...I recommend pleasant! ...You may quote me...''
As in my post about Cary Grant, I have pictured here all the favorite movies I can think of, leaving the "Harvey" pictures, one in color, as the most represented.
There are so many moments in movies that he made, I can only surmise that any other fan may have completely different memories than my own, but that doesn't matter. The fact that he was the favorite of so many is no surprise to me!
The next ones that come to mind are "Mr. Smith," "Rear Window" and "It's A Wonderful Life." All three of these, to me, are a draw...I cannot choose a favorite among them. And what makes that nice is the fact that each one is a different genre ~ drama about the corruption of politics and the American dream, drama about a murder mystery and a drama/comedy about a man who finds out what would have happened if he had never been born. with a little bit about Christmas thrown in.
"Rope," "Vertigo" and "The Man Who Knew Too Much" were also suspense-types, directed by Alfred Hitchcock...and each in its own way is a masterpiece.
And then there was "Mr. Hobbs Takes A Vacation," about a man who, unhappily, takes his family for their yearly sojourn to the beach and very nearly succeeds in alienating each and every member of the group, much to the delight (and chagrin) of his long-suffering wife, played by the ever-beautiful Maureen O'Hara.
And there you have it. My "Jimmy Stewart List" ~ my favorite movies of my 2nd favorite actor of all time.
I could sit and watch these movies any time, all day long if possible, and more than once I have done just that, ever since breaking my leg.
There were so many good actors to come out of the so-called Golden Age of Hollywood, but for me, there were only a couple who stood out over and above the rest. Yes, one was Cary Grant ~ that's a given ~ but Mr. James Stewart comes in with a VERY close second!
If anyone were to ask me, I would simply take that quote from Elwood P. Dowd...and you can quote me on that!

Entry for July 21, 2008 ~ Like A Weed...

2008-08-24T11:21:00.000-07:00

And isn't he growing?!? Like a weed, as they say...
I must admit to being in love ~ all over again ~ every time I see this little guy I am "hooked."
How well I remember years ago, after each of my children was born, being completely smitten with a new face, a new cry, a new pair of eyes...eyes that would gaze into mine, bore into me, as it were, seeing things that I barely knew about myself!
Love completely and forever given......
Then there is the birth of a grandchild, one who is, by all rights, the one who has nothing to gain by missing me, and yet, nothing to lose by knowing me, either! lol...
I do not get to see Andrew every day; he lives, of course, with my son and his wife, about fifteen miles away. I do get to see him once or twice a week, and these visits have become so precious to me and to his grandpa Mike ~ I would hate to miss one, to find out that while we were out, they stopped by and had to leave before we got home. To see how he has grown since his birth, doubling his weight, out-growing his colic, learning to do things like hold his bottle or respond to someone whom he knows and who loves him...
I hate to say it, but I believe I may be in the greatest danger of wanting to see him more and more ~ not less, like some grandparents who cannot wait to"hand the grandkids over" to the parents and go about their lives again, just as if there were no interruptions worth bothering about...all the while saying ~ or rather fooling themselves really ~ that they already raised their children, leave the new ones to the parents and please not to "bother me with all that again!"
No, not for me, that...I want to be a favorite of his, of all my grandchildren...whether I have one, two, ten, fifty...
There is a good chance that, as the mother of eight, two of whom are married now, I will have many grandchildren. I can't wait for the day that a daughter or son of mine tells me that there is to be another blessed event!
And this, to me, is the biggest reward to being absolutely pro-life ~ the more children with which my family is blessed by Almighty God, the better I will love it. To watch them all grow and become whoever they are meant to be is a privilege and an honor...a real treat!
The more I get to see them the more I will like it, the better ~ and more complete ~ my life will be for it...and believe me, I am all about making my life as complete as I possibly can!

Entry for July 04, 2008 ~ God Bless America!!!

2008-08-24T11:20:00.000-07:00

There are so many times in a persons' life that mean alot personally ~ and there are other times that happen to everyone at once, and those times also mean alot ~ to everyone at once.
To celebrate the birth of a nation surely is one of those times.
Even tho' we are in the middle of a so-called war on terrorism, we still bear the fruits of the freedom on our own home soil ~ and that, at least, is something for which we can all be grateful.
I won't go into what ever reasons there might be for so much conflict overseas...maybe it's the terrorism, maybe it's for the oil, maybe it's both, I have absolutely no idea. I don't pretend to understand the workings of the politics of such things. I am an Artist, intent on adding beauty to the world, not taking it away.
We can all thank Almighty God for the grace to be born in such a wonderful free land. We can all thank Him for the everyday workings of our freedom. And we can continue to thank Him by praying for all those others, not lucky enough to be born here, who crave the freedoms which we have taken for granted all our lives.
We all have those personal moments that mean so much to us on a personal level ~ and then there are days like today, the birthday of our great country. And that, for sure, is a reason for celebration on a grand, national scale.
Happy Birthday, America! God bless you! And God bless us, everyone!!!

Entry for June 29, 2008 ~ An Ordinary Chap?...

2008-08-24T11:18:00.000-07:00

I love Cary Grant...always have, always will.
When I was growing up, I would catch his movies on the old Bill Kennedy at the Movies program ~ the most often played was "Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House," "My Favorite Wife," and "Topper."
Other favorites that I caught on to later were "The Philadelphia Story," "Arsenic and Old Lace," "To Catch A Thief," "Suspicion," "Alice In Wonderland," "North by Northwest," and many, many others.
I realize nowadays people go to the movies expecting all kinds of special effects, action and sarcastic-type humor. None of the subtleties of bygone days for the modern crowd!
In those days (we have noticed) people were also much more dapper, well-dressed and well-mannered. Not loud, no foul language, no over-done anything...
There was a classy-ness that pervaded the movies back then that one is hard pressed to find anymore. Actresses presented themselves to the public in elegant gowns, actors in three-piece suits.
In this picture (above) I put together some of the best work Mr. Grant put out ~ his Mr. Blandings character being my favorite ~ which is why I left it in color. Too bad they don't make movies like they did back then...
The scope of his work entailed everything from slapstick comedy (he was one of the best with his timing) to the most serious roles (for Alfred Hitchcock) ~ even in the hard-to-find "Alice In Wonderland," of which I am most fortunate to own a copy ~ no matter what he played, he was outstanding in the part.
Mr. Grant hailed as a young actor, specializing in acrobatics and pantomime, from Bristol, England, and his real name was Archibald Leach. In 1920, he was chosen as part of his troupe to come to America in "Good Times" for Broadway and decided to stay here.
His career in film, to my mind, is unparalleled. He went on to make many movies, impressing everyone with his gentlemanly ways, his sexy persona, his wit and his screen presence. Once an interviewer remarked to him, "Everybody would like to be Cary Grant." He immediately shot back, "So would I." He was always one to say that he considered himself to be "just an ordinary chap."
It is said that, as he grew older, he became disenchanted with the new realism in modern film. I don't blame him; there are too many violent, graphic and offensive movies out now.
I am happy to say that my own DVD collection includes much of his work...since I only go to see the best!
Cary Grant was one of them.

Entry for June 24, 2008 ~ Had Enough Yet?

2008-08-24T11:17:00.000-07:00

There are many things that can happen to a person, to a family, in a lifetime. Many of them are good, many can be bad. There are more than alot of good things that have happened to me and my family in the 30+ years that Mike & I have been married. I am grateful for all of them; they have shown me God's will for my life, and I have tried to always go with His flow...
But even tho' the good things far outnumber the bad, there are a few bad things that seem to come up with a certain regularity here that even a slow-poke like me here can not help but notice.
That is the accidental nature of the broken bone.
I have probably blogged about my own broken leg no less than half a dozen times since it first happened, but there have been many more in my life ~ all of which, unfortunately, have happened to my family members...and I don't even know if I am remembering them all!
And when I think back to all the times I have taken a tumble myself, well then......I find it hard to believe that this is the first time I've broken anything, but there it is! Maybe that's why I broke two bones at once, eh? ...kinda like making up for lost time...
Anyway, here it is:
When the children were very small, we had a wading pool in the backyard and they, along with their cousin, were splashing around in it one hot afternoon. I watched them having a great time, and this went on for about a half an hour, until an argument broke out between Paul and his cousin Drew. The two of them had both climbed out of the pool and had moved to another part of the yard, where there was a pile of bricks that had not been put away yet, left over from a home improvement project. Drew picked up a brick and came after Paul, and before I could catch him, he had thrown it into the water, hitting my daughter Laura on her foot, breaking her big toe.
Fast forward about four years. We were now living in the suburbs, where we are now, and Theresa & Laura were out riding their bikes. Somehow T had lost her balance and fell on her wrist, breaking it in two places.
Again, back to Laura. The same day of a minor oral surgery, the doctor cautioned her to take it easy, right? Only for one day, let the medication wear off...no problem, doc! So, two cousins came over to visit, and I left the girls out in the front yard to quietly visit. In the middle of fixing dinner, I looked out the door to check on them ~ saw them sitting down on the lawn in a circle ~ playing a hand game. So, I went back inside...and not more than five minutes later, two of them came running into the house, screaming about how they were doing cartwheels ......CARTWHEELS?! ...and Laura, still shaky from the surgery, had fallen over, and now she couldn't move her arms! So, out I went, saw that she could not even lift herself up, ran back in and called for help. Off to the hospital, to find out that she had fractured her collarbone! "What did we tell you about playing quietly?!?"
Onward and upward...
Paul was working a part-time job while in school, as an assistant foreman in a plastics factory. As he was helping to set up one of the machines, a part which had not been fastened securely overhead came crashing down, breaking two bones in his wrist.
In the meantime, add to this mix, two daughters ~ Mary & Clare ~ having their jaws broken on purpose ~ during the course of various surgeries...and Mary nearly dying in the process! Long story, that...I'll blog about that sometime...
Then picture this:
Clare coming out to the car after school one afternoon, stepping off the curb to step up into the van. As she was falling under the van and crying out, "O-oh-owww!! My ankle!!" ~ and I am beginning to feel that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach ~ I just knew what was coming. Another broken bone, right? Haven't we had enough of that yet?
Not quite...
There was that fateful Winter morning, about 4:00...when no one else was around to help...and dearest husband Michael fell on the ice, in the street, as he was leaving for work. Unfortunately, being all alone, he had to try to drag himself up into the car and drive the 30 miles to work, while barely being able to move his leg. By the time he had parked his car, ridden the shuttle bus to the building and walked (or rather, hobbled) to his job, he had decided that it wasn't worth the pain, and turned right around and retraced his "steps" all the way back home. By the time I got up, he was sitting in the kitchen, not able to move. A visit to the hospital revealed that he had fractured his hip!
There have been other things, of course ~ with a family this size the odds are that much greater ~ but I think that just about covers the broken bones.
Until now, with me and my leg...
So now, it is my turn. Here I sit, thinking back to all of this, and I have to say that it's been quite a trip (no pun intended here, either)...Of course, there are, believe it or not, several members of the family who have never suffered a break.
I have no idea how their luck has held out this long, being a part of this family as they are, but I pray that, for them at least, their luck continues ~ for the rest of their days!

Entry for June 13, 2008 ~ It's Ok To Be Grateful...

2008-08-24T11:15:00.000-07:00

I looked up the word "gratitude" on Google...clicked on "images" and this picture showed up...I cannot remember where I found it; I believe it was @ a blog written by a Jewish rabbi on the subject of gratitude.

If you happen to come across this image in my blog, I'm sorry, Rabbi, I would give your site credit ~ I was quite struck by the graphic ~ but my Internet went "down" for a few minutes before I could save your name.
But in a hand, no pun intended, it shows exactly what this post is all about today......
It occurs to me that people just don't show enough gratitude these days. When one is given more in life than one can possibly or reasonably expect to receive, this person should be grateful. Grateful to Almighty God, most of all, but also to his/her fellows.
If a debt is paid, or if one is forgiven a debt, why not say "thank-you" and be done with it? Why drag it out?!? Or if someone comes into an unexpected windfall, just be happy ~ things could be alot worse!
Recently we were officially retired. Mike has been a Ford employee since 1972, and since his medical started, he was not working of course...but home for the past (nearly) three years. Now it is on the books; he no longer works for them. God has been so good to us that we are able to keep up, provide for our needs, enjoy our family.
Why would I not be grateful for this?!?
Believe it or not, there are many who would think differently, but that's their problem. I have always been one to trust in Providence, not being able to see what lies ahead, but knowing that He will take care of everything, no matter what it is.
There have been countless times in my life when I thought we would not make it (financially) but we always managed to pull through.
I cannot begin to count all the times when we were fearful for one of our children ~ illnesses, trouble with bullies at school, one or two times when one or another of them went missing for a time (long story) ~ and yet, now as I sit here and remember back, all is fine. It all worked out. No worries, as they say...
There are many in our acquaintance who tried to tell us that a large family in this day and age is a crazy way to get through life, but that's their problem ~ again. Not mine. Not ours.
As a matter of fact, Mike and I, to some people's way of thinking, were never supposed to make it at all. Not as a couple, not financially, not as a family unit...not in any way, shape or form.
I laugh now. We both do.
Alot.
And every day, as we look around at what we have, at the way our children have turned out, and at everything Almighty God has blessed us with, we can't help but be grateful!
It is only right to be this way ~ and we know it.

Entry for June 12, 2008 ~ Progress, eh? ;)...

2008-08-24T11:14:00.000-07:00

Progress...
It occurs to me that there are some things in life that move quickly ~ the passing of a day, the flight of a bird overhead...
And there are other things that don't ~ the growth of an oak tree, the healing of a broken bone...
Sometimes I feel as tho' these past few months have flown by, sometimes I feel as tho' it had taken me forever to get this far.
The other day, Mike & I were out to breakfast, and I asked him to stop at the mail box so that I could return a DVD to blockbusteronline.com ~ I get two per month, minimum membership. As we turned the car around, he stopped in the parking lot and asked me if I felt up to driving home.
Since it is only four blocks away, I figured I could do it; I was right. It felt good to get behind the wheel again, and putting that pressure on the brake pedal, using my broken leg, felt fine. It didn't hurt at all.
Mike tells me that, even tho' the doctor has given me the green light to start walking again, keeping my cane nearby, he doesn't want me to do that much yet.
I was taking a few things into the other room later that day and he told me that "no way should you be doing so much walking around."
Obviously, my husband is being very protective of me. It is nice to have a spouse who worries and protects like he does. Not that I want him to have to worry, but it's nice to know that he does.
As I look at this picture of a shell lying on a deserted beach, I think to myself that sometimes a person's life can be just like this. Nobody around to see the "progress" the animal ~ a crab, a snail, anything ~ may make, crawling along the water's edge, silently making its way to the other side of the beach.
Eventually, Mike won't mind if I move on to driving, walking and other things, lol ~ but in the meantime, I make a bit of progress here, a bit of progress there.
I go back to the doctor in four weeks...we'll see what he says then. In the meantime, I will bow to my better half and take my time, one step at a time.
Progress. That's what it's all about!

Entry for June 04, 2008 ~ A New Day...

2008-08-24T11:12:00.000-07:00

Pictured above, one hand-carved, blackthorn Celtic walking stick ~ a shillelagh ~ named for a Leprechaun's weapon, in this instance, a simple "cane" to help somebody like me to get around.
The ones they sell in medical supply stores are boring, no artistic merit to the design whatsoever, functional of course, but ugly as sin. So, when the idea occurred to me that I might have to use an aid like this as my leg heals, the first thing I told myself was, "Self, you are going to the Celtic shoppe and getting one of these!"
Yesterday I saw the doctor and he told me that, even tho' I still have a hairline fracture of the lower tibia, as long as it doesn't hurt, I can put my weight back on it, but to keep my walker handy nearby. If it does hurt, don't walk or stand on it.
That's fine, and I thank you, doc, but I am done with the walker ~ I hope! No more walker for me! I have been stumbling around for the past nine months (except for December/January) with a walker, and I am tired of it. If I really need it, it's up against the wall, waiting for me to take it up again. But I have already been using my stick for the past two days and I can say from the bottom of my heart, "What a difference!"
So far it looks as if I am still laid up, here on the couch, where I have been for the past three months, but that's ok with me. Like I said, I have plenty to keep me busy!
Only now, leaning up against my seat, ready to get me from room to room, place to place, is my trusty shillelagh, and let me say this:
It sure feels good to be able to get around once again! And every day I get closer to that goal of not needing anything to help me but my own two feet, as God intended. But He surely has been with me every "step" of this way, and for that, I thank Him with all my heart......
And, might I add here ~ as a Faerie-Tale loving Artist like me, and as one with a great deal of Scottish/English (and a bit o' the Irish) heritage in my background, I hope this makes my Celtic ancestors proud!

Entry for May 31, 2008 ~ A Whole Wide World Out There...

2008-08-24T11:11:00.000-07:00

Yup, my Mom was right.
She used to tell us when we were growing up that there was a big, wide-open world "out there" and that someday, after we had grown, we would get to experience all of it ~ whatever we wanted to take in.
If we wanted to travel, she would be happy for us ~ my parents loved to travel. If we wanted to stay nearby, that was fine ~ they lived in the state of Michigan all their own lives.
When I was single, I did some traveling...not too much, but some, enough for me. My husband Mike had done quite a bit himself, so he was happy to settle down.
For the past 30 years, we have stayed here, in Michigan...happily raising our family. Taking small trips up north when we could, sometimes staying for a weekend at my parents' cottage in Ontario when we could get over there.
And then, as the children grew older, they took their own trips to different states, up north, to Canada.
But for all of our short jaunts, we are homebodies at heart. And this brings me to my latest reason for musing......
Since breaking my leg, it has occurred to me many times how little I can get around now, through no fault of my own, depending upon everyone else to do even the smallest things for myself. It's better now of course, than it was when I first fell, but still I depend upon them.
And so, as I sit here, cooped up in the house (except for trips to breakfast with Mike or to the doctor's office or to Holy Mass), I am reminded that I haven't been anywhere else, either. I find my whole world right here ~ in my living room ~ in front of the TV. I draw pictures, I read books, I say my Rosary and other prayers. I "play" on my laptop. I keep up with the daily comings and goings of my family. But my "world" has shrunk.
The most I have seen of it, I'm afraid, has been through my own TV set ~ and there has entered into my life a whole new list of worldly figures ~ Dr. Phil, Judge Greg Mathis, A Haunting of the Discovery channel...and of course, my own favorite DVDs.
I get to see my front yard gardens, which I dearly miss. I see the flowers blooming, but smothered in overgrowth...and that will have to wait. And I have come to be a great fan of Dr. Phil, lol ~ and I am a connoisseur of the "judge shows" on the tube, as well ~ my favorite being Greg Mathis, who also hails from my home state.
Yes, Mom, I'm afraid that my "world" has been narrowed down to this. I sit in my living room and "watch the world go by," so to speak.
Soon I know I will be able to go back to my former life ~ walking about at will ~ and doing all that I was doing before. But in the meantime, I will have to remember that the whole wide world "out there" is only as big as I make it for myself... ...

Entry for May 26, 2008 ~ Family Updates...

2008-08-24T11:09:00.000-07:00

Ok...time to update this thing......I haven't had the chance to write much in the past couple of weeks, but that changes here and now...
Dear Daughter Andrea had her bridal shower last weekend and it was a huge success...about 150 women (and a few interested men, lol) came, sat & ate dinner, gave gifts, met new people and had a great time. It was almost more of a party than a shower, except for the gift-giving part...even beloved husband Mike had a good time ~ not being a big one for bridal showers...I think he was pleasantly surprised to see how they work! Of course, like I said, this was not the usual shower.
Friends whom we hadn't seen in months (one for years) showed up to wish the bride and her betrothed a joyous life and to say how much they look forward to the actual wedding.
It also gave me and Mike a chance to meet with members of Nick's family whom we had not yet met ~ both sets of grandparents for Mike, and for me, the grandfathers; I had already met the grandmothers. Two seasons ago, at Easter-time, we had all met in Nick's basement to color eggs with the time-honored methods of Pysanky. His family is partly Ukrainian, and every year his mother's family meets to decorate and create even more complicated designs than the year before. Sad to say, that was the only time I had been able to participate ~ with this broken leg it would have been nearly impossible to navigate the steps to the basement...
As for our own grandson, we have had the pleasure of being with him a couple of times since I last wrote. He is doing better with the colic and I have even had him laughing a couple of times...he has such a wonderful, bright smile...and when he is content and playful there is no one more lovable.
One of his favorite things is to watch colors and lights...we can't wait til he has his first Christmas and our own Tree is his personal plaything; since I always go overboard with the lights and crystals, he will not be able to take his eyes off of it, I'm sure, lol!
And getting back to my leg ~ one more week and I go to the doctor to see my next step ~ no pun intended ~ do I graduate to the cane? do I go without any support? do I spend another month on the couch? only my doctor knows for sure...One thing I do know ~ if he tells me I need a cane, it is straight to the Irish shop for my very own blackthorn piece.
All I am certain of at this point is that I intend to dance at Andrea's & Nick's wedding in July...and with or without a cane I will kick up my heels in celebration!
After eight years they deserve to be together......and our dear Nick will finally, in more than name-only, be a real honest-to-goodness member of our family, just like he has been in spirit for so long!

Entry for May 13, 2008 ~ Whatever Happened To...

2008-08-24T11:06:00.000-07:00

Whatever happened to common sense? to decency? to modesty and chastity?
Whatever happened to a parent's right ~ no, an obligation ~ to protect a child?!?
Our daughter Andrea is getting married in two months. Her sister Julia (pictured above) is the Maid of Honor. All of our (six) daughters will be in the wedding ~ the bride herself of course, the MofH, the other four being Bridesmaids.
This next Sunday is the Bridal Shower...and everyone we know will be there...Julia showed me the dress she plans to wear ~ a cute polka-dot, black 'n' white with a flared skirt. The reason I bring this up here is to illustrate a very good reason why I can compare my own daughter, who is 21 years old now, to a younger, more famous (or should I say infamous) girl, who is frequently in the tabloids, the news, the stage and the spotlight.
Her name is Mylie Cyrus, the 15-year-old daughter of country singer Billy Ray Cyrus and his wife Letitia.
Normally I don't pay much mind to the younger celebs; being 57 myself, I have my own life, my own interests...and little time to give to gossip and nonsense.
But there is something recent and which corresponds to the events going on at my own house that I just wanted to mention here...the fact that our six daughters, all just as lovely as Mylie, but having been given just as many chances and choices in their own lives, have chosen to take the other road, the one less traveled in these days of immodesty and impurity.
The way girls are brought up these days, to follow any fashion trend, I am surprised I was able to keep my own girls as pure as they have remained to this day ~ and I give full credit for this to our Faith in God and His Church. We always tried to show a good example and without giving a daily lecture, but showing by our own lifestyle that much more is expected of us than to "show some skin" and give in to whatever is currently "in style."
Unfortunately, not so in Hollywood...and poor Mylie is, I fear, the latest victim in this never-ending line of nearly-naked "wannabes"...to show their own innocent selves in provocative manners, whether or not it is perceived by others as being such...it is exactly that. And according to those "in the know" ~ other celebrities exposed to the same pressures ~ it seems that the modern way of thinking goes along with "whatever feels good, whatever one wants is ok" and to hell with convention, tradition and any kind of normalcy ~ especially for young girls in the limelight and all the others who look to them as role models, and also, and just as important, all the young boys who see their contemporaries in such exposed manner and are given over to the ways of thinking that this is how it must be!
Why then, tell me please, do we wonder why a young man, after years of such exposure, grows up to believe that whatever he wants to do with a young woman ~ whatever liberties he cares to impose upon these young women ~ we pretend to be so shocked!?!
No wonder men think women are their personal playthings! A boy sees a young girl like Mylie, posing in Vanity Fair wearing nothing more than a bedsheet, and assumes that other girls will show him the same if not more...
Society has a long way to go if this is ever to change.
Back to our own six daughters...Julia was not sure about the neckline of her dress...and asked me if I had a brooch or pin that would close it up more...it seems it is cut lower than she had first thought when she bought it. It has a lovely half-circle brooch at the gathering just above the waist; as it happens I do have a snowflake brooch with the same stones, smaller setting, which would be perfect to keep it modest...and a perfect pairing with the other, larger piece.
But it would take years of raising a daughter ~ let's call it "conditioning," shall we? ~ to expect her to come to this idea on her own. Knowing that just a small touch to keep herself well covered and pure is a simple gesture that Julia has come to all on her own ~ would Mylie be capable of the same??
Her father claims to be so protective of his daughter, and I question where was he in this situation? Did he allow it for the money, the publicity? I would have thought that Billy Ray, being the so-called conservative parent that he claims to be, would have felt the right ~ no, the obligation ~ to put his foot down and say, "NO!!! My daughter is better than any of that! She will NOT be taken advantage of!"
Thank God that I am married to Michael, not Billy Ray. Celebrity status notwithstanding, I would rather have had a single daughter like Julia than a million like any in Hollywood ~ for all their money and fame.
It won't get them where they need to be......

Entry for May 06, 2008 ~ For Just A Moment...

2008-08-24T11:05:00.000-07:00

For just a moment, I was able to stay with my Grandson. For just a moment, I held him, I fed him, I played with him. For just a moment, he gazed up into my eyes, I gazed down into his ~ and we connected.

For just a moment, he gave me a fleeting smile. For just a moment, he held my finger in his tiny hand and drifted off to sleep in my arms.
Our son Paul called us on Sunday to see if we could babysit Andrew while he and Kristy ran some errands and I immediately said "Yes!" Finally, a chance to hold Andrew as much as I wanted, with no one telling me that he has to leave... ...
So, they dropped him off at our house with instructions about his feeding schedule, his colic meds and his favorite "fuzzy" ~ a soft blue blanket that is so gentle to the touch it would put an Angel to sleep!
As I sat here on the couch, my leg up on a pillow and the TV remote handy, lol ~ I held him and cuddled with him.
Of course, all of his Aunts and his Grandpa Mike had to get into the act, so it was impossible to keep him to myself ~ even Aunt Mary came by when she found out that he was on our side of town ~ but sooner or later I knew that it would again be my turn, so it was easier this time to wait patiently while others had their fun. The only one who wasn't home all day was his Uncle Stephen, so he really didn't have a chance to visit with Andrew, but that will soon be rectified. There will be the next time, I'm sure. Around here, everyone comes and goes, busy with whatever, but always with at least just a moment to stop and visit with this newest little member of the family. His parents were to be gone for hours, as even after their errands were done, they had friends in the area whom they hadn't seen in quite a while and who had bought a new house. So, there was that opportunity for them to stop over there, free of responsibility ~ for just a moment ~ and visit, admiring the property.
Back at our house, we were having a wonderful little visit of our own; we hadn't seen Andrew in a week, so it was a great chance to get to have him up close, all to ourselves ~ even if it was for just a moment.
Unfortunately, he has a bit of colic, so there were a couple of fussy times, but what is that when there are lullabies to be sung, eh? I was glad that his medicines seem to work for him, and that he is, all in all, a very sweet-tempered and happy baby. He seems to take after his mother in his looks, for the most part, as far as I can tell, but he has a bit of his father's "look" to him as well, in the way he looks at you. He gives one the impression that there is something he knows that is hidden from the rest of the world...and Paul had that same look when he was small. As a matter of fact, he still does.
And as I sat here holding him while he slept, I wondered, "What does a baby have to dream about? He has almost no life experience, so what does he have to take up his reverie? No sailing ships, no puppies or kittens, no drifting snowflakes..."
And as he was waking up, he caught sight of me looking at him and he gave a small smile. Just enough for me to know that, no matter what his dreams were, they were good. So, again, for just a moment, all was well.
And then, sadly, his parents came back to claim their son.
It seemed to me that, even tho' I had him for most of the day, it only lasted for just a moment.
For just a moment, I held him. For just a moment, I had him. And for just a moment, he was mine.
Maybe, next time, the moment will last longer than just a moment...I hope so.
Because to have him for just a moment is never enough... ...

Entry for April 22, 2008 ~ Up, Up and Away...

2008-08-24T11:03:00.000-07:00

I broke my R leg in February, on the 17th to be exact. I knew I was looking at a few weeks of R&R ~ rest & recuperation ~ and hoped that would be that. I went into the hospital, had two surgeries, one to insert an external fixator which held my leg in traction for three days, the other to do the actual repair by installing a rod and two plates. I had broken both of the two lower bones, the fibula and tibia. They even had come through my skin, but since I was wearing jeans at the time, I had no idea of this until later, at the second hospital, one of the residents pointed it out to me...showing me the break in my skin and explaining what it was from.
I have known many people who have had broken bones...and knew that at least one-two months of recovery was standard, depending . My daughter Theresa had broken her wrist as a child, her twin Laura had broken her collarbone and had to wear a brace for a few weeks. Daughter Clare had broken her ankle just a couple of years ago, sat around for a couple of weeks...at the same time, by coincidence, Theresa had sprained hers...and her healing actually took twice as long as Clare's! My husband Mike had fallen a couple of years back and broken his hip ~ a hairline fracture, but it kept him out of work for a solid month! Our son Paul had broken his wrist at work a few years ago, also, when he was employed at a plastics factory.
So, from all of this, anyone reading this can plainly see that my dear family has had more than our share of broken bones with which to contend...but I guess it must be part of God's plan for us and we live to talk about it all, lol.
Since my leg fracture is but the latest episode, I find that we have once again adapted to this predicament...only this time it is me sitting around, everyone else waiting hand and foot on me ~ no broken pun intended ~ and still we survive the day.
However, there is but one catch here...one that I had no fore-warning until this very afternoon would ever happen. We went to see the doctor, had a new set of xrays taken, and were told in no uncertain terms that I will be sitting around for another SIX weeks. According to my doctor, the tibia takes a good four months to heal. Mine is doing fine, straight as an arrow, thank God ~ and from that I assume that the fibula is also well...but still, another two months of rest should just about do it, lol. Poor, poor little ol' me, eh?
Up until today I was not allowed to put any weight on my leg at all; now I can put up to 50 lbs. of pressure on it, but that is all. I can sleep without my "boot-cast" finally, lol...but when I go out, I have to wear it for protection. I can sit at home without it, I have to continue to use the walker ~ no shileleigh yet ~ and I was at least hoping he would tell us that I could start using one so I could carry things from room to room, if nothing else, to help myself!
My poor family has been doing it all ~ cooking, cleaning, driving ~ you-name-it...no complaints, but still they have lives to live, too!
All I can say is KUDOS to my family!!!
Mike and I have been told many times over the years that we have an exceptional family ~ every one of our eight children has gone on to become an amazing, wonderful, loving and well-adjusted adult. Thoughtful of others, helpful and kind, they make us proud. I have always laughed when anyone told us how well we did ~ I like to respond that we had really great material to work with!
In the meantime, I sit here...awaiting the day when I will be able to walk again ~ albeit while using a cane ~ but at least walking and holding something in my hand while doing so!
I will go for a walk in our nearby State Park. I will walk into church and not wheel myself in using a chair. I will be able to do what I want to do ~ yard work, clean the kitchen if I feel like it, dance at my daughter's wedding in July, even!
And the day that that happens, when my leg is healed, I will hear the song in my head that was a hit so many years ago ~ "Up, Up and Away!" ~ and it will feel to yours truly here, after four+ months of pulling myself around on a walker, using my arms for legs ~ like I am truly flying! And I may never come down again!

Entry for April 19, 2008 ~ A Tale of Real Life...

2008-08-24T11:02:00.000-07:00

Did you ever in your life wonder about...
Things that others did or said that left you speechless or in total wonder? Things that you find in your day-to-day existence that are actual miracles in the making? Or fodder for a Faerie Tale?
Everyday events that happen to others that you never figured would ever be a part of your life and when they did happen to you, you had no way ~ no words in your personal vocabulary ~ to know how to express how you were affected?
I have felt that way many times.
There was the time when we first pulled up in front of the house where we have lived for the past twenty years and I thought to myself, "This could be it. This could be where our children will grow up." And then, as we were looking around, I remember standing in the middle of the back yard, under that huge maple and thinking, as I looked around and at the back of the house ~ most specifically, at the kitchen window ~ "This could be where our children will play their games. This will be their view of me as I gaze out upon them, watching them from the house, seeing them invent their own fantasies."
And again, as the years passed, seeing them make friends about the neighborhood, learning to ride two-wheelers, draw with chalk all over the sidewalk, have picnics with their dolls, play baseball using that slab of cement in the middle of the yard for home plate ~ and all the rest of it ~ what could be more magical, more fun to watch??!
The day when I found out for the first time that we had a resident Elf living in our back yard tree...who watched out for single children playing alone in the yard, until someone else came out to play and keep them company ~ our children were always safe!
How about chasing all over town to find that perfect Christmas present that they were so positive they wanted? Only to finally find it two days before and breathe that sigh of relief?
As two of our daughters prepare to move out on their own later this year ~ one within the next month or so and the other about to be married this Summer ~ I have had more than the usual occasion to look back and to remember the past. Going through boxes of photographs, old hand-made birthday cards and other such sundry paraphernalia, it is in my face nearly every day lately.
There was that day that our daughter Andrea told me that she believed that there were faeries in the garden just because I said so. *smile wistfully*
And there was Mary's third birthday, when she kept her father up all night before he had to leave @ four in the morning for work, just so she could play with the pretend kitchen set that we had given her ~ her life's dream! A sink, a stove and a fridge of her very own, toy foods with which to feed her sisters and brothers...an excuse to play with water! wow......
The day I came home from having to be out for hours and finding out that Andrea had gotten into my bead boxes, cross-stitch threads and other craft supplies...and created three small wooden snowmen (or rather, two snowmen, one snowwoman)...which stand proudly on our mantel shelf to this day.
And when Mary received her first real cookbook from Santa Claus, The Mary Frances Cook Book, which rated preparations of different meals by whether or not she needed any help to fix them. O-oh, the goodies she prepared from that book!
Happily for their father and me, both girls will be living within five miles from us, so it will be easy to keep up with their lives ~ in person, thank God.
Sooner or later, I know, all eight of them will be out of the house and on their own. This will be two and three for us; with one son married and a father himself and our other son still here...and leaving four more girls yet to leave. One by one it will happen...it always does.
In the meantime I plan to savor every moment...just so that, when I look back years from now, I will have no end of those moments that took my breath away, inspired memories for me that bordered on miracles, and created real-life stories in my mind that will go on to outshine any Faerie Tale ever written.

Entry for April 12, 2008 ~ Sitting, Reflecting...

2008-08-24T11:00:00.000-07:00

I have had this Blog now for over a year...sitting, reflecting, writing...
There have been times when I was about to give it all up, not thinking myself any more of a writer than the average Jane on the street. Even tho' some tell me different, my own love Michael the most vocal of all ~ ~ there is that nagging doubt in my mind, nonetheless.
But that's ok.
I read the musings of others; I see that they post about their families, their jobs, their lives. They all, every single one of them, have something to say; and which one of us has the right to take that voice away from them, I wonder??
Certainly not me!
I enjoy reading what others have to say. I like reading their opinions and seeing pictures of their lives, their families...
I often wonder what we would all be doing if we had not the Internet to post ourselves for others to see? Would we have even imagined such a thing twenty years ago? or even ten?
Think back to earlier times, eh? The pilgrims, for example, lol..or maybe the western settlers?
Stepping off the Mayflower, running back to the cabin to grab that laptop...or maybe reaching back into the wagon, inspiration suddenly rearing its head!
Fast forward to Edwardian times...humor me, please. A family in a great mansion, sitting in the parlor, the parents typing away, laughing to themselves as they remember things the children did or said earlier in the day, eagerly relating events to family members who might log on later from faraway in the old country.
And then, we find ourselves in the days of the Great Depression. Do you think those old computers would still be working? Do you think that, with electronic advances so far back into history, that there would have been a Depression to begin with?!? Seems like there would have been so many more jobs to go around!
Now, here I am ~ modern day. Sitting, reflecting, writing...
It might not make sense to anyone reading this, why I take my mind where it follows. And where I end up, no one knows until I get there.
It doesn't matter to me, anyways. I end up where I end up.
There have been many times when I felt inspired to write here, but didn't. I came in, settled with a cup of coffee and a bit of idea, and then pfft!
There it went ~ gone! ...like a puff of smoke.That's the difference between writing and drawing to me. When I feel like writing, I have to follow it immediately, or it's gone. Sometimes I can get it back...but the idea must be completed within a certain timespan. Or it's too late, I don't want to follow it anymore ~ at least that's how it is with most topics, until they strike again.
With drawing, however, I can follow the same Muse for days, weeks, months ~ for as long as it takes to finish a drawing, it doesn't matter. It will get done.
So, speaking for my writing when the idea strikes, this is it. For now. I have followed this idea to its conclusion and found the time and place where it leaves me.
And this time, it leaves me sitting here, reflecting and writing...to the bitter end.

Entry for April 07, 2008 ~ Finally Here...

2008-08-24T10:58:00.000-07:00

This is a blog entry that I have waited for months to write.
When our son Paul told me on my birthday that I was to become a Grandmother, I was so excited I couldn't believe how lucky I was. I jumped up and hugged him so tightly, with the tears in my eyes...and everyone else standing around, watching and laughing.
After having raised a family of eight children and seeing the oldest take a wife, I knew it was a matter of time before this would come, God willing. And it did ~ and not too long did we have to wait, either.
They were married in October, 2006, and barely a year later, in September, 2007, came the news. So, as becoming Grandparents goes, we were blessed that we received such a gift in such a short time.
But then the real waiting began...
Finally, however, thank the Good Lord, our little Andrew Michael was born this morning ~ and I was so happy to finally meet this little soul who had kept us all in suspense for so long.
The only thing I regret is the fact that he is not mine...so I cannot take him home and see him every day, watch him as he grows, learns and becomes a man.
I, as his Grandmother, will have to be content to watch from a distance. So, as a Grandmother, the game is totally new and different for me than it has been for the past thirty years.
I just hope that it will be enough.

Entry for March 31, 2008 ~ My Favorite Things...

2008-08-24T10:57:00.000-07:00

Everybody has 'em. Not everybody breaks into actual song over them , however, but they do impact our lives, just the same.
It could be a flavor of ice cream, a color, a book or movie ~ something that reflects what we are, who we would become, or even just a remembrance of an early childhood event or memory.
Yes, a favorite thing is ONE thing that everybody has in common. It doesn't matter where we come from or where we are going. It doesn't matter what our family is like, or what we like to do. Something in there will become a "favorite thing" by the time we grow up and stay with us for the rest of our lives.
As I look around the house I see all kinds of favorite things, some belong to the kids, some to me or my husband. They could be sports-related, Art-related, musical or story-telling. In a family of ten people, there are alot of collections going on ~ all the time ~ trust me when I say this!
Not everyone in my family is an Artist, like me. Dear daughter Andrea is, however, and so are Theresa & Laura. Our son Paul is an Artist also, does wonderful things with 3-D materials, especially wood. That collection (toolboxes and piles of materials) went with him when he got married, but there are many reminders around here just the same... ...mainly examples of his work ~ shelves, picture frames, carpentry to the house itself.
Our other son Stephen, on the other hand, is a Sports enthusiast. Football, soccer, running and working out are his passions. So, in his room, there are trophies and equipment everywhere. He is also good with wood, but for now is not as "into" it as is his brother. Probably years from now, when he has his own home, he will be grateful at least to have knowledge of it.
Mary, our oldest daughter, is an Oz fanatic. Wizard of Oz books, statues, glass globes and DVDs will fill the shelves and tabletops of her new condo when she moves out in about a month...but a ready-made decor is awaiting her!
And so it goes on...every member of a family, no matter how large or small, leaves his or her mark on the environment...for better or worse. As they have grown and moved on, I have come to expect my home to reflect the tastes and interests of my children...and whoever is the next to move out will be taking all of their personal collection with them.
I have to say that, all the years of complaining and grumbling about "stuff" has brought me naught but memories of sharing my space with a group of individuals whose tastes and interests have left their mark upon my psyche.
Even when those particular collections have not been a reflection of my own interests, they have been a reflection of those of my nearest and dearest. And whether they were "raindrops on roses" or "whiskers on kittens" made absolutely no difference at all in the Grand Scheme of things. Any collection that shows a tiny bit of someone I love has been a welcome addition to my home, and I will always profess that, of all my own "favorite things" that reflect my own tastes and interests, those of my family will continue to clutter the corners of my heart ~ and out-shine any collection of "things" that I could have come up with on my own.

Entry for March 25, 2008 ~ A Way of Life for Me...

2008-08-24T10:55:00.000-07:00

I was sitting here, writing to a friend of mine...and while telling her about my leg, it occurred to me that falling down must be a way of life.
For me, at least...
When I was in the hospital, a nurse asked me if I fell often. I had to admit that I do. Ouch!
I have been falling down all my life. I have blogged about it here before, so anyone who reads my Blog regularly will remember that. But here I am again, living proof for anyone else who might not yet believe it!
I grew up with trick knees, have arthritis now ~ and even tho' my knees were fixed when I was young that does NOT mean that they have been perfect ever since.
Granted, they have not 'gone out' nearly as much as they used to, but there have been the occasional times when I was still laid up for days at a time because they did. Countless times.
And then, of course, there have also been the other times when I have taken a fall ~ down the stairs when I missed the step, slipped on apple peels on dry sidewalks (yes, I really did that), gone down on the ice, and lost my balance, simply put.
There was one time, while working in one of the gardens in the front yard, when I was backing up from a plant, stepping up to the retaining wall, and suddenly, back I went ~ down on the back of my head, right on the driveway!
Another time, I was in the shower (pregnant with my daughter Mary) and my R knee went out. I fell, right there in the shower. I was in my seventh month (I think) and thankfully, nothing went wrong with my baby! To fall down when pregnant is no laughing matter.
Another time, carrying her in her car seat (she was about a month old), I slipped on the ice right there next to the car door and fell, my legs going under the car itself. Again, happily I did not drop her!
My poor, poor children, eh?!?
Then there are the innumerable times when I have fallen on the ice, or...no ice!
There was that beautiful, sunny, dry as a bone day in early Spring, I was a student @ WSU, riding every day to school with a friend. We had just met in Old Main and were walking to his car and talking. Suddenly, I was on my back, staring up at the sun and he was about ten feet ahead of me, talking away, not even noticing that I was no longer beside him.
As he started to realize that he was alone and he turned to see where I had gone, I was just picking myself up from the sidewalk, cursing that rotten apple peel ~ the one that had mysteriously disappeared, by the way ~ and did he believe a word I said, as I insisted that there had been one?!?
Think about it......
There was another time when, years earlier, I was at the cottage with my family ~ we had a cottage on Lake St. Clair, Canadian side ~ and Winter had frozen the waters into a veritably limitless ice skating rink ~ I was gliding along on the canal, my Dad was down at the edge of the lake. I saw him down there and decided to skate over to him. When he saw me he began waving me back, calling out that the ice was too thin there and that I would fall through...but I couldn't hear a word he was saying, and I had the impression that he was actually waving me onwards! So, I continued to skate further out, until all of a sudden, I heard a crack!
Down I went, over my head, into the icy cold waters of the canal (which was about 15' deep at that point) and my Dad came skating over as fast as he could, to the rescue!
As he pulled me out, sputtering and spitting, I was able to get a grip upon the edge of the hole I had made, climbing out onto the surface. Back we went, the two of us, to the cottage ~ and my Mom got me into a warm blanket, made me some hot chocolate......and needless to say, that was the last time I skated that weekend!
I could go on here, relating story after amusing story of my exploits and foibles, my falls and near-misses...but this is getting embarrassing.
So, for now, I think I've spilled enough beans...and bodies.

Entry for March 23, 2008 ~ Two At Once...

2008-08-24T10:54:00.000-07:00

I've been getting some, but not alot. Not all at once, anyways. Two, maybe three hours at a time ~ that's it. I can usually get through the day just fine if I got at least 5.5-6 hours the night before.
I'm talking about sleep.
Ever since I broke my leg, I have gotten no more than a couple of hours in a row.
It all started in the hospital. You know how they come into your room, just for a minute at about 9:30 or 10, tell you "It's just for second. Here, take this, it will help you sleep, help with the pain, its for your condition (what ever that is), we just need one more vial of blood, get some sleep, you need to rest now, yadda-yadda..."
And then it's all about interrupting your sleep for the rest of the night. And if they weren't coming in every couple of hours, I was waking up anyways! Let me just say this: sleeping nonstop on your back is very tiring, only not the kind of tiring that makes you want to get back to sleep right away.
And ever since I got home, I have been waking up every two hours or so. With this cast-boot on my leg, which I have to wear all night, it is all I can do to move into a more comfortable position and fall back to sleep right away...usually it takes me another twenty minutes (and only twenty minutes if I'm lucky) to fall back to sleep.
It's really weird, too, cuz lately I can't seem to stay up past 10:30 and then when I wake up in the middle of the night, it's like 1:00 in the morning, I feel like I've had a full night's sleep, and then the next thing I know, it's 3:30! Then, I will be awake until about 4:15, or so, and then again at about 6 or 7...
This has been going on for a month! Woe is me!
If I didn't know myself better, I would be willing to bet that someday soon I am going to turn into some psychotic, sleep-walking zombie with one leg and no sense of balance, aim or direction...and find myself with my head stuck to a wall.
I know I should not complain...there could be much worse things to worry about! I could be having nightmares, I could be really sick here! Heck, I could be President! Then what would I do?!?
But in my own little world, a good night's sleep is a really nice back-up to a day ~ even when that day is spent sitting on the couch.
I have been promising myself that I was going to get some things done while I am laid up here...paperwork, drawing, reading, posting to friends through my laptop, etc. And thankfully, the past couple of weeks I have been doing all that. Even with a lack of more than two hours of sleep in a row, I have been able to function. And, believe it or not, I have not been dozing here, while comfortably ensconced among pillows and a lap blanket! I could be, but surprisingly, I am not.
But what I am wondering is this: what happens in two or three months when I am walking around again and my life is back to normal (as normal as my life gets)? Will I be sleeping better by then? Since this is an ongoing phenomena ~ the whole broken leg, two hours of sleep thing ~ will I be able to go for 5.5-6 hours like I did before all this happened?
It's not like my leg hurts, either. It hasn't really hurt since I first did this. So, it's not that...but there is definitely something going on here.
And some night, while I am lying there, trying to get back to sleep, I might just figure it out. In the meantime, if you happen upon me and find me stumbling along and weaving a crooked line, just remember this: I probably just got done pulling my head out from a wall somewhere, and am trying to find my lost hours of sleep.
So just point me in the direction of the nearest blanket, please!

Entry for March 19, 2008 ~ A Plan for Nothing...

2008-08-24T10:52:00.000-07:00

We have twelve gardens. All in raised beds, spread throughout our property ~ five in the front yard, seven in the back yard. And every year, just about this time, I am browsing catalogues and online sources for new plants to buy, to fill out all this garden space.
Well, needless to say, I will not be ordering new plants this Spring. Being laid up with a broken leg, I find it hard to believe that I will be able to kneel in the dirt at all for the next several months, let alone do all the other various and sundry garden chores that I had planned to do.
I bought a brand new wheelbarrow last Fall, and silly as it sounds, I was actually looking forward to using it this year ~ I wanted to order two or three yards of garden soil and put my new tool to work, as several of the beds are in need of replenishing. So, unless one of the resident garden faeries decides to push it for me, there ya go!
I planted about 75 new irises in the back yard last Fall, so at least I did get something done! The sad part of this is, some of my favorite sources have sent me coupons already, wondering when I am planning to send in my next order ~ and where on earth have I been?!?
Sadly, I am right here...not regretting my broken leg ~ already been there, done that ~ but bemoaning the fact that it happened just on the cusp of planting season...and how in the heck am I supposed to climb around in all of these raised beds, pulling early-season weeds, pruning roses for the Summer growth, fertilizing for a new year of color, transplanting anything that might need it, and all the rest of it?
I know I can get my family to help. I know they will be able to pull some weeds and perhaps deadhead where it is needed. But the fact is, most of the gardens and their layouts have been due to my own vision...and it will remain up to me to get the bulk of it done.
So, already, now at the middle of March, I can picture the end result...even tho' there was so much I had intended to do, it will most likely have to wait until next year.
I will continue to browse my favorite gardening sites and catalogues. I will also go on planning in my head all the visions and dreams of what my gardens will someday become.
But for now, here while I am stuck, I will have to be content with that.

Entry for March 12, 2008 ~ A Heart of Gold...

2008-08-24T10:50:00.000-07:00

My husband has some health problems...and a couple of things are serious enough to keep him out of work permanently. He has been on a medical since June, 2005. Off and on for several months before that, and finally our family doctor refused to OK his return to work ~ for good.
We have been through so much together these past few years, all the doctor's visits, the hospital stays, the paperwork to get the early retirement and Social Security disability ~ no small feat, believe me!
And yet, when I look back on all of this, all I see is the man I married, his love for his family, and his heart of gold.
For over 30+ years he has slaved away at his factory job to support me and our eight children. He has gone without complaint to the one place on earth where he did NOT want to be, just so we could eat and keep a roof over our heads. He has put up with more than is expected from most other men, just because of his determination to do the best he possibly could.
And when his health problems got to be too much for him, he took a medical leave, and now, nearly three years later, he is very nearly complete with preparations for medical retirement.
I thank Almighty God every day of my life for this man I married.
Today we had an appointment with his heart specialist, and the news was very good ~ his "numbers" are excellent. He is doing fine. The doctor said he is more lucky than most...and for my part, I would like to believe that.
But there is more...
I credit prayer and hard work. I credit monitoring his medications, and his diet. I credit the diligence of health professionals, to be sure, but even more than that, I credit his heart of gold.
He knows I love him. He listens to me. He would never do anything to hurt me or our family.
He has surprised more than one doctor with his "numbers." And I daresay he will continue to do so ~ all with God's help, of course. His heart of gold, especially where his love for his family is concerned, won't let him do any less that that.
Yes, my husband is a remarkable man. He not only confounds his doctors, he continues to amaze me, and I've known him for more than half of my life! I have never known any man with more love in his heart, and his is truly a heart of gold that beats with a strength that no doctor can measure.

Entry for March 07, 2008 ~ So, How Am I Doin' So Far?...

2008-08-24T10:45:00.000-07:00

Well, at least now, some progress...
I saw the doctor yesterday, and it's all good. My leg is still perfect inside, although I must admit it is not without color on the outside.
Ten new scars!
Yep ~ ten!
...small ones, all of them, and for each one I am grateful, since without them I would still be lying on the sidewalk, my leg and foot bent at incredibly unnatural angles...but how funny to have five staples here, seven there, three sutures down here, another four or five over there, etc.
When I first went in for my second surgery, after lying in my hospital bed for three days with an external fixator on my leg, the surgeon ~ Dr. Patrick W. ~ told me that I would either have one long scar down the front of my shin, or several small ones here and there, and it all depended on what he found when he saw my bones. As it turned out, the latter is what I got, and I don't mind either way, but I have to say that it does look kinda funny.
But at least now, I have only six more weeks of no weight-bearing to look forward to, then it's walking in the same boot/cast, followed by (maybe) some therapy and probably after about a total of four-to-five months, I will be done!
There are, of course, a few things coming up in my life that I am happy to say will not be so affected by my lack of mobility at present ~ the upcoming birth of our first Granchild, little Andrew Michael, due the end of this month, for one thing, and I plan to be there, in my wheelchair ~ ~ welcoming him with happy arms, and nothing, least of all a broken leg, is going to stop me!!!
My consecration to my Guardian Angel takes place some time in April, and I don't see the doctor again until that last week, so I am afraid I will still be in a wheelchair for the ceremony...but I don't think my Angel will mind that. He will still be there at my side, with his hand on my shoulder, taking my Promise with delight and satisfaction!
Later this Summer, when our daughter Andrea gets married, I am hoping to be able to dance! She has been with her Nick for over seven years, and we are all anxiously awaiting the day.
And in the middle of all this, our daughter Mary is planning to move into her first home, either a condo or a house, and I am hoping to be able to be there for her, to help clean or paint, unpack or whatever else she might need me to do...I might have to do most of this later in the season, of course, but I don't think she will care, as long as she knows that I am there for her!
In the meantime, here I sit ~ drawing pictures, reading and playing on my laptop ~ and watching movies on the DVD player...So much to do and so little time, lol...
Well, since that is my life right now, I guess I am resigned. I have no choice. But to tell the truth, I am happy to be here, out of the hospital, home with my family, getting spoiled. My leg will be all better by the end of the Summer, and just in time to miss the growing season by the way, but c'est la vie!
When I get there, I will be none the worse for wear, and this will be one experience I will always remember fondly as the time I got to be lazy ~ with the perfect excuse!

Entry for March 03, 2008 ~ For the Love of...

2008-08-24T10:44:00.000-07:00

I have said it before and I'll say it again.

To be the mother of eight children, two more in Heaven, is what I consider to be a divine call. Not that I hold myself above any other mother, to be sure ~ it was not my first idea to have a large family...it was just the will of God.
When a couple gets married, they might be thinking of becoming parents right away, or not. They might say to one another, "Let's have three ~ my girl, your two boys." or "I would like to wait a year or two, get used to being married first."
What ever...it is not my place to judge anyone's family style ~ everyone does what they like, if they can.
Then, there are the more unfortunate ones who, after trying for maybe five or even ten years, find they cannot have a baby, no matter what. They probably go into their marriage thinking, "When it happens, we will be happy...I hope it is soon." And then, nothing.
They plead, they cajole, they might even try to bargain with God. "If we have a baby, Lord, we will etc, etc."
And who can blame them? The desire for children is innate in most of us, I daresay, if we get married. We want to love a baby, we want to teach a baby, we want to see a baby grow up.
It is just the way we are.
And this brings me to myself.
I come from a family of six children, my husband from a family of five.
We came into our marriage with every expectation of having a baby or two, or God willing, three.
Well, funny thing about that ~ we never had three!
We went from two to four.
And then five until eight.
We lost two in between, of course...so we have our own Saintly army praying and pulling for us before the Throne of God as I speak.
But it was entirely His will that brought us to where we are today.
First, there came Paul. Born in 1979. Big brown eyes, his father's eyes. A real sense of humor. Smart, thoughtful, full of energy. Loves the outdoors, never wanted to come in from the rain...and a real cookie thief, the best I've ever known! Loves dragons and anything by JRR Tolkien. A carpenter by trade. He's married now, and expecting a son at the end of this month.
Second, there was Mary. She came along in 1981. Greenest eyes I've ever seen. Ambitious, smart, loves a good mystery movie, very self-assured, and a real go-getter. Has a good friend in just about every city in the state. She is an accountant now, looking forward to her first home soon.
Theresa & Laura came along next, born in 1982.
Theresa is an actress/writer. Funny, kind-hearted, helpful. Loves a good romantic comedy. Still in school (part-time) and works in an Irish shop. Always willing to volunteer for anything needed at the church, a real friend in need.
Laura, her twin, is like her, yet different. She too is sweet-tempered and thoughtful. Always there when a helping hand is needed. She is also part-time in school, also working at the same shop with Theresa. She also writes, a different type of story, but she is majoring in broadcasting, so there is a bit of a different mindset there, anyway.
And then we come to Andrea. Born in 1983, feisty and full of spirit. One of the funniest people I know, loves to be involved. She is about to become an Art teacher, and is engaged to be married this summer. Believed in the fairies in my garden when she was small...just because I once told her that they were real. Has a very creative mind, a child's imagination.
Next, comes Clare. Born in 1985. Greatest laugh I've ever heard ~ infectious to the core. If I am in the next room, I can stop what I am doing and listen to her laugh...and I will start to laugh myself. It doesn't matter one whit that I don't know the joke. And it reflects her entire personality. She is her father's Italian daughter...fiery spirit, full heart. Wonderful writer, too, by the way ~ a journalism major. Loves all kinds of music, especially vintage. And Monty Python. Jumps to the fore when there is work to be done.
Now, I speak of Julia. Born in 1986. A real "people person." Studying to be a therapist. Loves a thriller, or a psychological drama. She definitely took her time figuring out what she wanted to do, but once she decided, she has held onto her goals and gone after them with a vengeance. Has a lovely sense of humor, very loyal to her good friends and family. A wonderful, sensitive spirit. And a sweet, loving heart.
And finally, I come to Stephen. Born in 1988. Ever since he was a little boy, he has been a sensitive one, but now he hides it more under a layer of humor and an understanding of the world around him ~ observant, a good listener, a superb athlete. Has enough dedication to excel at anything he tries, and will make a wonderful officer of the law, his major course of study. And devoted to his family. Absolutely loves a good joke, especially when it takes him by surprise. Helpful and kind-hearted, good to his parents. And even tho' he is the eighth child, I can't imagine our lives without him.
When they were growing up, we would get all kinds of comments, some positive, some negative. Everyone wanted to know "how we did it." And I am here to tell you, even after all these years, I still don't know "how we did it." I guess by the will and the grace of God.
No, we didn't start out expecting to have a large family. But I don't believe we would take back one day of it, either.
People tend to compare what they don't understand, I find. If one child is one way, they expect the others to follow suit. They will see differences in their own children, and either rejoice in that difference or let it slowly drive them crazy.
And, like any flower garden, a family of three, six or even ten people comes together in the end, only after years of careful tending and hard work, and with the bloom of each "flower" the garden springs to its fullest life in the sun.
We have always rejoiced in our family, and have always been grateful that God chose us to be the parents of our eight. To sit back and "watch the show, the blooming of the garden" was not only a daily source of pride and a reason to be grateful to Him, it was also a veritable treat.
To think that while some may only get one or two kisses at night, before the lights go out, we would get eight. Every night.
And that is a number we will be more than happy to acknowledge any time!

Entry for February 29, 2008 ~ A Week of Thought...

2008-08-24T10:41:00.000-07:00

Sitting around...not a good thing to do for the most part, if one has any kind of a life to attend to, work to get done, errands that won't wait, and all the rest of what ever it takes to run a household of nine people. (For so long it was ten, but slowly we are seeing them leave the nest...)
A few months ago, I had a bad fall and sprained my R knee, as anyone who reads my Blog already knows. So, there I was, sitting around, reading & drawing, doing what I wanted to do to pass the time, waiting until I could walk again.
Now, of course, with a broken leg, there is going to be an even longer time before I can start moving around on my own again. I wrote in my Catholic Blog about what the word "musing" means to me in my life, how I have ample opportunity it seems, and how I use this word in both of its meanings.
I really like the word "muse" in that I have time to think more now that my family is grown and even tho' most of them still live here, they all have busy lives. The other meaning, the "Muse" that inspires an Artist, is always "on" in my head ~ leading me to create my work.
So, with that said, it seems that as I now have at least two-four months staring me in the face here; I will have alot of time for "musing."
In my other Blog, I mentioned that it must be God's will for me to be laid up at this time ~ how this happened to me at the near-beginning of Lent, I think, was no mere coincidence. He must be telling me that I need time to work on myself spiritually. And I must need the time to get some drawings done ~ looking at my table, with things backed up there is to see this is true ~ and
there will be no excuse now for not getting any of it done.
I have to say that, in a way, I am looking forward to it. I have never been the overly active type to begin with; as a kid I was always looking for a way to steal into my room to draw pictures. I was always happy when it was raining, so I could stay inside and read my Faerie Tales. Now, don't get me wrong ~ I loved doing things like riding my bike or playing in the sand ~ but to be on my own was my dream of a best day.
Right now, as I sit here, I am looking at a drawing of a bridal bouquet that I have to finish for my daughter Andrea. And I was also wondering, just this morning...maybe I should come up with a new drawing for my new grandson Andrew, when he is born in just over a month's time...theme of Teddy Bears 'n' Stars...I think I can have some fun with that!
In the meantime, I might as well make the best of being laid up, n'est pas?
I have some reading to catch up on for the OA; my consecration is coming up quickly, this April. I also have other reading to do so that I can finally be formally consecrated to Our Lady in the spirit of St. Louis de Montfort; I am already consecrated to Her in the Brown Scapular of Mt. Carmel, but I have always wanted to go to finish with the more formal one, as well.
This is, I think, the perfect time for me to catch up on my "life's musings," so to speak. That is the name I chose for this Blog, and that is the theme of this entry. I will most likely write more about my thoughts here...what I come up with as far as how I'm doing both spiritually and artistically, and if I make the progress that I would like to make, I will post that here. I have been presented this extra time, it was not my plan, believe me. But as long as it's here, I will make the most of it.

Entry for February 23, 2008 ~ It's News to Me...

2008-08-24T10:40:00.000-07:00

It's surprising to me that anything like a broken leg can be as "painless" as this...
I have certainly been through alot in the past week, but as I have always heard that a broken bone is by far the most painful injury one can experience, I am happy to report that it is not what I expected it to be!
Having given birth to eight children, plus enduring two miscarriages, I am here to tell you that childbirth is much more excruciating ~ albeit much more worth the trouble ~ and I am astonished that this past week has been as easy as it has been.
The worst part was being away from home.
But the two ambulance rides in the pouring rain, clad in soaking wet clothing, and all the cold, the waiting in the first ER and the x-ray tech who did NOT know what she was doing (long story) and undergoing two major surgeries in less than four days' time...all this put together is really something to write home about!
I could go on here about the waiting...and the fact that there were so many admitted that same day due to falls and accidents because of the ice...but I won't. Instead, I will talk about the fact that when I receive the mailing from the hospital in a week or two, concerning my recent "visit," I fully intend to tell them about the woman in the radiology department in the first hospital who really could use more help, and the kind gentleman from the dietary department in the second hospital who remembered that I adore a cold Vernors.
These two, to me, represent the two extremes of care that I received during my little adventure...and I intend to commit every waking moment of this past week to my memory.
There was the young nurse who came rushing into my room on Tuesday morning, anxious to tell me that she, too, had fallen ~ after we had had a nice long chat about that very thing the night before. Luckily, she had only bruised her hand and her side, but I daresay even these injuries have since proven to be more painful than she first suspected they would be.
Then, there was the other young woman from the lab, who came to take my blood that same morning, who was also anxious to share the tale of her own fall ~ bruising her knee.
Everywhere I turned this past week, I was told of others taking falls on this treacherous ice ~ and my own family was not in the least bit spared, either!
My dear husband Michael had taken a slip himself, but luckily was able to save himself before going all the way down. Our daughters Mary, Andrea and Clare also reported falling...although as strange as it seems, Clare did NOT fall on the ice, but on the very salt that the school maintenance had spread to guard against it!
So, anyone reading this can probably note that this has indeed been a week of contradictions ~ from hospital personnel who care nothing about others, to those who pay attention to even the tiniest details for their care and comfort...not to mention the family whom I love with all my heart, even as I lie in my hospital bed, in imitation of me, falling and enduring their own painful injuries.
There is, however, one thing of note that I would like to point out here ~ and that is the fact that broken bones do not hurt as much as I have been told they do!
After my second surgery, I was weaned immediately from the morphine and put on a much lesser "drip" for pain ~ the name of which escapes me ~ and the only sad side-effect was the constant sleepiness I felt. Then to be sent home with Loritab pills, which actually work better and longer than the other stronger drugs...I must say that I have felt the urge to take them only once in awhile, much less than the nurses expected of me.
So, anyone who tells me in the future how painful their own broken bones might have been, I can only say that I sympathize wholly with their misery, but I must also admit that my own has been much less than I would have expected!
And for this, I can be most grateful...

Entry for February 21, 2008 ~ Maybe I'll Just...

2008-08-24T10:38:00.000-07:00

Maybe I'll just stop walking altogether. Maybe I'll just start using a cane or walker or wheelchair...all the time. Maybe I'll just sit for the rest of my life, draw pictures, not go anywhere, eat at my drawing table, crawl into bed at night, and do no more than that!

Maybe I'll just let the rest of the family do it all for me...
I had just gotten over my badly sprained R knee, and now this. Walking out to the car the other day and slipping on the ice ~ all I remember was feeling a "pop" and a sharp pain down the front of my lower leg.
At first, I screamed, thinking my R knee had gone out of joint ~ I've written about my trick knees here before ~ but almost at once I realized that it was not my knee, but my leg. My legs, especially my R one, have been a trial to bear all my life.
Being a strict Roman Catholic, however, has at least taught me the value of suffering, of offering it up for others, and using it as a help to my own soul...so I do know that suffering in this life is inevitable and can be very useful.
But that doesn't make me like it any more than anyone else!
As a matter of fact, that's the exact thing that makes it suffering to begin with...
I had just stepped off the front porch and warned our daughter Julia to be very careful ~ it was extremely slippery and to take small steps. The next thing I knew, she was trying to help me to get up! Unfortunately, as soon as I tried to use my leg to move over to a better position, I suddenly realized that my foot was no longer attached to my leg...and I told her to call "911" and go get her Dad.
As luck would have it, our neighbor Steve, across the street, was just getting his own car ready to go out with his wife, and heard me scream, saw me fall, and came rushing over.
When he saw my leg, he immediately knew that it was broken and said as much ~ and left me to lie back down until my husband came out to help. Then, our daughter Mary rushed in to get our son Stephen, and the three of them helped me over to the bench on the porch.
I could not move my leg at all without extreme pain, so I just sat there until a fire truck and an ambulance pulled up in front of the house.
The truck left right away, having made certain that they were not needed, and the EMTs splinted my leg and got me onto the stretcher for a fast ride.
When we arrived at the hospital, I was taken to the ER and left on a table for over an hour ~ apparently, a broken leg is not life-threatening ~ and as I watched, more and more people were rushed in, nearly all of them victims of the ice. One boy had fallen and hit his head. A small girl had fallen and apparently broken her wrist. An older woman was the victim of an automobile accident. Another woman had fallen, and her poor husband looked like a victim himself...neither of them appeared to be feeling too well.
By the time I was actually being seen by a doctor, we were told that at least 26-28 people (counting myself) had been admitted!
There is so much more to this story that I am afraid I might have to put off telling more of it until tomorrow...but suffice it to say that it has been one heck of a week so far, and it promises to become even more fun as the days progress...
For now, sitting here in my hospital room, I am thinking that to tell it all at once ~ when it might make for a better story if told longer ~ would make more sense.
So maybe I'll just wait to tell more tomorrow...maybe I'll just wait til I have my thoughts collected...and maybe, just maybe, I'll not be so full of pain meds that I will be able to think straight and write about it.
Maybe I'll just do that!

Entry for February 15, 2008 ~ Huh? How Did That Happen?!?

2008-08-24T10:33:00.000-07:00

It has long been a bane of my existence that I have to shop. I am not speaking of the once-in-a-while clothes shopping (altho' I hate that as well) or now and then needing a new refrigerator or coffee table.
No, what I am talking about is GROCERY (and various other daily sundries) shopping...that every day, "Mom! No milk?" "Are we out of shampoo again?!?" "I can't find the lawn bags! Don't tell me we don't have any more lawn bags!?!"
And the list goes on and on and on...
Where is it written that a Mother's main raison d'etre is to shop? Tell me, I'd really like to know.
I can spend an entire day driving all over town, dropping this one off, picking this one up, making it to appointments, stopping for a quick visit in church to the Blessed Sacrament, visiting my Mom...and yet, when I get home, even after all that ~ "Mom! Did you get more toilet paper?!?"
I shake my head, as I slip out of my dripping wet shoes, shrugging off my coat, dropping my purse onto the nearest couch. "No! I was not aware that we were out of it."
"MOM!!!"
Ok, I will go now...as I slip back on my dripping wet shoes, shrug back into my coat, pick up my purse and head for the door.
"Oh yeah, and we need bread. And cheese. And Dad's out of Pepsi. And can I borrow a couple of bucks for my lunch tomorrow?"
So, I guess that also means a side trip now to the nearest ATM, which, not by accident, is located totally out of the way ~ thereby necessitating a longer drive just to get some extra cash, which I had had no intention of pulling out in the first place!
"And when you get home, can I borrow a lift to so-and-so's house?"
By the time I am finally done, my day is shot.
I had planned to work on my daughter's flower designs for her wedding, coming up faster than it rightfully should, and maybe get in some reading, cleaning a room (heaven forbid!) or perhaps fixing a dinner on time for once.
All of this and much more ~ that is what I do. I look at the housework and am told by my loving family "not to worry" but still I do. I feel somewhat guilty about sitting at my drawing table, but I also still do that anyway. I spend time on this laptop of mine, not wasting it, but trying desperately to keep up with friends online and reading for my Faith...where I have learned so much, and would like to continue to do so...
Yet, surprisingly, things do get done around here! I have no idea how or when it came to this, but I have to wonder, "How did that happen? When did they become so responsible, so helpful?"
And what do I get for my trouble? I'll tell you what I get...
I come home, after fighting the traffic wars, running errands for the family, keeping up with appointments for my husband and his doctors or for various trips for the kids...and I find the living room has been vacuumed (by one of the girls) or the laundry has been finished and put away. Dinner is cooking (thank-you, my loving spouse) and the snow has been shoveled from the sidewalks and driveway (sometimes by the girls, sometimes by our son Stephen). The birds have been fed and watered, the mail has been sorted and handed out, the other groceries (bought earlier in the day) have all been put away. During the warmer weather, the grass has been cut and trimmed (by Stephen) and the garbage has been put out (also by him, and sometimes without a reminder, lol), and the dishes have been put away.
Does anyone out there wonder why I do what I do for my family?
Every home has a 'way' to run, and the people who live in it are all responsible for various turns at these 'ways'. I guess, for now at least, my 'way' is to keep things on the outside running smoothly ~ all the errands I have to take care of, no one else can do right now ~ so I will continue to do them until I am no longer needed to do so.
And as long as the family takes care of some of my load here at the house, then I'm fine.
Someday, I expect, I will not be so 'raggedly run' and I can finally sit and drink that second cup of coffee...taking in the vista of my own abode, here in my corner of the world...and bring to mind all the memories of various 'things to do' lists...and wish those days could be here again.
In the meantime, I will be content to do whatever I have to do to get things done, all day, if that's what it takes ~ and be grateful that I have a family for whom to do it!
And then I will look back, shrug my shoulders and ask myself, "How did that happen? How did they all get to their respective ends? How did I finally make it to where I am now?"
And I will sit, sip my cup o' Joe, and wonder......

Entry for February 08, 2008 ~ I'm a What?!?

2008-08-24T10:31:00.000-07:00

Well, here I am...thinking real hard.

Hmm-mm-m......and I'm wondering why, after all these years, my hidden love for writing has decided to rear its frightful head!
I have blogged about this before, but here I am, still blogging away ~ who would have thought, seeing as how I am late-50's now, that I still had so much to say!?
Like I said before, I am an Artist, not a Writer...so where does all this come from?
There are other, more talented writers in my family; I don't compare to anything they have put out, but I still try.
I guess after a life lived and lessons learned, I feel that somehow I have something to share with those who might not have had the same experiences I have had. I have certainly "been there, done that" and as far as I am concerned, I am still there, doing it.
When I finally breathe my last ~ God only knows when that will be ~ I hope to be able to look back and say to myself (and probably to everyone else, lol) that I made a difference in a few lives...that what I did and how I lived had an impact on other lives around me.
My dear husband is fond of telling me that he cannot imagine his own life without me ~ and believe me, the feeling is very much mutual! And he is also fond of telling me that I seem to have a knack for writing. But I have to say, it comes as a complete surprise to me.
To my way of thinking, I am just a person who likes to talk. I have thoughts in my head, hopefully for the better, and I try to express them, what ever they may be. If some poor reader comes along, having nothing better to do, and happens to read something that I have written, then I say, "Welcome to you, dear Reader ~ I do this for you."
And if, on the other hand, nobody ever reads a word I write, then I will simply put it in my own head, with a self-congratulatory smile and say to myself, "Congratulations, Jenn! You have succeeded in reaching nobody! How very productive of you..."
And then I will put down my virtual "pen and paper" here, meaning my trusty laptop, and turn off my Writer's Muse until the next time I get inspired to use a talent that I do not possess!

Entry for January 23, 2008 ~ A-aa-agh-gh!!!

2008-08-24T10:29:00.000-07:00

Oh, my g-o-s-h!
Could this get any worse?!?
For nearly two weeks, our routers have been 'on the Fritz'...ever since removing the Christmas Tree to its off-season resting place and moving the TV back to its normal position, cabinet et al, we have been having nothing but problems with the routers!
First of all, as the TV cabinet was being moved back into position, someone must have stepped on the plug connection to the upstairs wireless router (a D-Link) and broke the casing, thereby making it impossible for the connection to remain solid.
So, no worries...off we went to the local Best Buy, because of course they will have a replacement cord ~
NOT!
"I'm sorry, ma'am...we do not stock replacement cords for routers; but if you like, you may buy a new router and install that instead."
Well, at the time, I was thinking, no! all I need is the cord...the router is fine. And by the way, who could be thinking that a store that calls itself Best Buy ~ complete needs for all electronics and such are served under one roof ~ could not possibly stock a simple electric cord?!?
So, off we went to the nearby Radio Shack ~ but uh! oh! ~ they closed ten minutes ago. Bummer, that...
On to Meijer's ~ where, to our dismay, they DID have a universal replacement cord, but only two in stock and both packages had been broken into, making it impossible for the clerk to allow us to buy either one!
"Nope, sorry ~ no more in the back room, either!"
It figures......
Well, since by now it was too late to do anymore about it, we were stuck with the connection that was 'leaking' out and about the neighborhood for the rest of the night and then, in the morning, a brand new day in which to do battle.
In the morning, we went to Micro Center, the biggest computer conglomerate in the whole of the state, and asked there about a new cord...and, once again, were told there was no such thing, but would we like to look at an upgraded router, perhaps a Linksys?
Fine, but only if it came with a guarantee of bringing the Internet with it!
Of course, no problem...
Well, since it was on sale and we did have no choice, we went with that.
And for the next week and a half, the confusion of having two IP addresses in the same household (between the wired router, also a Linksys, in the basement ~ hooked up to an old, non-functioning desktop) and the wireless, shiny new one upstairs ~ hooked up to send signals to all the wireless laptops throughout the rest of the house ~ we were sent into a veritable Hell of unimaginable Internet horror, complete with lost signals, no signals, slow starts, lost pages, a possible virus, and of course, the option of returning said wireless router to the store to exchange it for (hopefully) a working one, which we did eventually do ~ at the advice of our future son-in-law, our family computer expert, Nick. Since that time, this past weekend, he has re-configured the entire set-up, so hopefully this is the last of our router dilemma!!
Add to this the fun attraction of having to have my entire laptop overhauled by Nick (bless his smart heart!) and there is my past two weeks...no rest for the weary, I always say.
Of course, there remains the possibility that the demon who watches over all the Internet and seems to have no end of tricks up his sleeve, may just decide to pay us another visit sometime in the future...but I would like to interject here that may he please just wait until I am long dead and gone? I know we can very well do without the Internet itself; I mean, after all, what did people do for fun way back then, eh? But the thought of having several children in college and needing it as everyone assumes nowadays that everyone has it, and not to mention the hoardes of paper work that can accumulate upon a household of busy people who wait patiently (hopefully) for the page to load ~ this is not to be tolerated for long!
And just what may happen upon us as we sit at our laptops ~ I would pray would not be so terrifying as a stalker behind every curtain!
But you just never know...do you?!?

Entry for January 06, 2008 ~ A Few Thoughts...

2008-08-24T10:27:00.000-07:00

Just a few words...
The end of the Christmas Season, back to the day-to-day. New Year's come and gone...Little Christmas (the Epiphany) today, over soon enough.
Everyone about town taking down their outdoor lights, Nativities and plastic Santas.
Mike & I went out for a late lunch today at one of our favorite local restaurants...and they had their lights in a pile at the front entrance, just waiting for someone to pack them away. The neighbors are all out taking down wreaths, inflatable snowmen (thank goodness for that!), and all the rest of it.
And all I keep thinking is this: Will they pack away their spirit along with the boxes and bags? Will they remember, come the middle of April, for example, that they had just four months earlier been wishing everyone they know a 'Happy New Year' and 'All the Best of the Season'?
Will they be cutting their fellow drivers off on their busy way? Will they be taking cuts in lines at the grocery stores? Will they be back-stabbing and name-calling at every cross-turn?
Of course they will...
This is Earth after all ~ not Heaven!
A New Year's resolution for every one of us should be 'I will remember the good things I wished for everyone during the Christmas Season!'
Ask me again in April...let's see how we are doing then, eh?

Entry for December 27, 2007 ~ My Favorite Night Light...

2008-08-24T10:25:00.000-07:00

How many people are there out there who can wax eloquently about their family's Christmas Tree?
I am one.
I am fortunate that my youngest memories of the Season are taken up with the sight of this wonderful new addition to our living room which took up so much of my sight...both in my memory and in my heart.
All the way back to my early childhood, with my own father making the annual trek to the Tree center to pick out the best available ~ always a Scotch Pine ~ and carrying it home, hanging out the back window of the station wagon...
There was one year, as I recall, that he ventured into the world of the Colorado Blue Spruce, but the very next year it was back to his all-time favorite Pine...I never knew the problem with the former, but I was too young to care. All I knew was that the Season just wouldn't be the same without those green boughs hanging alongside the staircase as we came down each morning, and the sight of my mother kneeling beneath the branches to reach the water basin.
The first year my husband and I were married, we would have gotten our very own Tree, but for some reason, we neglected this time-honored ritual until it was too late to do anything to rectify it ~ and sadly, when my parents came over for a holiday dinner and my father noted the lack of this display, in the home of one of his very own offspring, he nearly had a stroke!
That was the first and last time we had no Tree for Christmas.
After we moved into the home we have now, twenty years ago, I ordered a 7.5' tall Tree, complete with over 2750 'points'...and believe me, every one of those is decorated!
If anyone reading this takes a look at my picture, above, they will see a Christmas Tree resplendent in all its finery ~ from the lights to the icicles to the hand-made ornaments given to me over the years by my own children.
This brings me to the present and my favorite night light, that is, my Christmas Tree.
All through the years that our sons and daughters came home on last days before their Christmas vacation, toting ornaments and cards in their wakes, and the crepe paper, the construction paper, the gold and silver dust ~ all over the house, but beloved just the same.
The wishes of children at Christmastime are the most precious thing this side of Heaven...and this is the reason I refuse to stop decorating my Tree.
I have many, many ornaments that I have made myself. Being an Artist has certainly given me ample excuse to do so...but still, my favorite ones are the ones made by my family for me, given in love and with laughing hearts.
People may think that I call this precious Tree my favorite night light because of the way it sparkles in the night...with the lights glowing and the crystal ornaments shimmering as they dangle, reflecting like so many prisms of rainbow brilliance...and this is true, to a point, but not completely the only reason why. There is a much better, more heart-felt reason, in my own way of seeing, that tells the true story.
To me, the creations of children reflect more than anything else, the spirit of the Season ~ and every elementary school teacher knows this to be true.
So does every mother......

Entry for December 19, 2007 ~ The Annual 'Rush'...

2008-08-24T10:23:00.001-07:00

Well, I'm ready! Are you?

I'm talking about Christmas shopping here...the big mad rush to fill up every bag and bundle in sight...the crowds and the music and the lights and all the rest of it...Yes, I am done!
I laugh at the crowds this time of the year; I never 'do' the mall. As a matter of fact, I have never 'done' the mall for Christmas in my entire life!
I 'did' catalogs when my children were small; then it was one trip to Sears or w/e to pick up the order ~ $500 or $600 worth, but it was all I could do ~ and I would get it all in one day! Then, I would browse other catalogs and make miscellaneous orders to be delivered to my home.
Now, even easier here...all stored in my laptop! hehe...so that's where I find it all, and the selection is limitless!
Of course, nowadays, we only get a couple of gifts for each of the kids, as they all work and buy for each other as well...so that really did alot to cut down on the list. And, as we did last year, I expect we will gather around the Tree and pass out gifts to each one again...it was so much more personal and enjoyable that way.
I do feel for everyone who leaves their shopping until the last minute; I was never able to do that, myself...with eight children, I would not have survived the Season if I had tried! But I can say this: I am so much more calm about it all, now that I don't have to start in July, lol...and get it done by Thanksgiving!
The Season has come to mean alot more to me now that I can honestly focus on the real spirit and not on money and buying toys and the annual 'meltdown'...
Yes, I am done; I wish I had been this easy about it all years ago ~ I could have saved myself so much hassle...I talk to some now who started out giving their children two or three things right from the beginning, and I think, 'Why did I feel like I had to do so much?'
I'm sure my children would say the opposite ~ but I guess we all live and learn.
I certainly have; and I don't regret my life's journey...
One thing I would not change is the memories of all those Christmases of the Past...I wish with all my heart that I could go back and re-live each and every one of them!
But I can also say that I am most grateful to Almighty God that they seem to have picked out the most important meanings from the Season and kept them all in their hearts.
And that is the most important Gift of all......

Entry for December 15, 2007 ~ Enough, already!!!

2008-08-24T10:22:00.000-07:00

Ok, ENOUGH!!
I have literally had it up to here with my van...if anyone reading this can relate to constant non-solicited car trouble then I am not alone.
My van, a 2002 Ford EconoLine converted model...not old, not too high in the mileage department for an almost seven-year-old vehicle ~ only just over 60,000 at this point ~ already has gone through two warranty repairs in the past month!!!
First, about a month ago, the transmission starts to fail ~ and I am driving along while literally jerking with a severe whiplash down the street until I cannot stand it, calling and being told, 'Just bring it right in, Mrs. D....happy to take a look at it!'
So, I do just that.
No worries there, right? 'It's a warranty job, Mrs. D., just a mere $100 deductible and you will have a new transmission! Just leave it to us!'
Fine.
Two days later, I drive out of the dealership with my supposedly new transmission.
Then, last week, it starts jerking and racing again...so I call. 'Just bring it right back in, Mrs. D., we'll check it out.'
The manager, who test-drives it with me, says he thinks it might be the ignition, not the trans this time...but again, a warranty job. Just another mere $100 deductible, and I'm all set!
Ok...so I leave it again, this time for five days.
We get a call on the second day and are told that it is the head gasket leaking...a big engine job, I understand (my husband put bread and butter on our table for 30 years building this part of the Ford engine, so he knows the work involved here)...but we're good, right? We have our leased replacement, so no worries there!
Yesterday, another call ~ 'Your van is ready to be picked up; don't forget to get to it today if possible, or you will have to renew your leased car!'
'No problem,' I reply. 'There's nothing I love more than driving around in a billboard!'
So, I go in to pick up the van and turn in our rental...the service tech shakes my hand and once again exclaims how lucky we are to have such a wonderful warranty agreement ~ two major jobs within a month, for just $200!
Wow...imagine my elation here...not.
You see, when we took it in this second time, as it was racing and jerking again and being told that our (what we thought) new trans was really just an overhaul...
Well, that would be ok for some, but today as I was driving my daughter to her work, it went out on me AGAIN!
We were driving along and suddenly it started to whine and race and I could not get it to go over 35mph, in a 50mph zone, no less...so needless to say, sitting in the lot at her work and waiting for her sister to come out (she was just getting out of work ~ they work in the same shop) I called my husband and told our son to stand by...and then, when I tried to start it up again, I am suddenly jerked forward with a huge lurching motion...so I put it back into park and called home...
'I am not driving this van home ~ I am not driving this van another foot! Come and get me!'
So, dear son comes to pick us up and I am now sitting here, sans van, thinking about how nice should I be when we get these people on the line first thing Monday morning and explain to them that they get to tow in our 'running like new' van, which they swore to us was all set, and FIX IT RIGHT THIS TIME!!!
Honestly, what ever happened to the old-fashioned horse and buggy? I hear tell all they needed was enough hay to feed the horses and an occasional new wheel......

Entry for December 13, 2007 ~ Catching Up...Keeping Up...

2008-08-24T10:20:00.000-07:00

Well, this is not exactly my calendar, but this time of year, this is exactly what mine looks like...I cannot get two minutes of peace and quiet together to save my life! (good thing I don't have to worry about saving myself too often)
Since I have a family to care for, even the simplest day looms as busy. There are too many things to keep up with, so why do I bother?
There are the endless doctors' appointments...the latest of which was just yesterday's visit to the Cardiac Care Unit @ our hospital for my husband's heart test ~ to make sure that his BIVICD is working properly ~ which it is, thank-you very much! All would have gone smoothly with no problem, if one nurse had listened to him when he said that the IV of anesthesia was actually hurting his arm, and now, since she insisted that she knew best, his arm is swollen and sore...not to mention the doctor's warning as we left, 'Don't forget now, if he falls asleep and can't seem to awaken, call the EMS! He might be losing his airway!' Ok, so maybe it is a bit more complicated than it was supposed to be...no worries! Just enough to leave me hanging on with suspense for the rest of the night! Many thanks to that 'smart' nurse, who ended up re-doing the IV in the end, anyway...and spending the rest of our visit avoiding his room, leaving it to her partner nurse to keep a watchful eye on the 'leaking' medication...
Then there is dd Julia's hold-over from last year's bout with kidney stones...another visit to the specialist the other day, and a new cat scan which we have yet to complete...but all seems to be well there, at least!
Onward to the latest trips to the dentist, which used to be a long afternoon, when they were all small but at least getting it all done at one time, now seemingly non-stop appointments as this one can go on such-and-such day, that one can't make it...so can we please make five different appointments?!? Fine, except that they all have a way of filling up my calendars, and I get to accompany some to these 'calls' as well...and then, when I finally have it 'under control' (I wish!) there is always the one who has to change at the last minute...not to mention ds Paul, who is married and on his own now, but is still trying to keep up his own dental battle...recuperating from an extraction and bleeding that kept up for two days!
And then, there is the extra running as well ~ extra trips here and there, can we do this or that? can we go here or there?
Now that Christmas is just beyond the horizon, there are also all the get-togethers to look forward to...the biggest one being on Christmas Eve, with my own family. Early evening Holy Mass with the kids and on to my brother's house for goodies and frivolity!
O, tis the Season......what joy is mine...
Our Christmas Tree has been up for nearly two weeks, since the First Sunday of Advent, but today we finally got around to hanging the bulk of the ornaments...and I have still to get to all the icicles! Hey ~ one thing at a time, please!!!
And yet, when it is finally finished, it is now, has always been, and always will be my favorite Night Light...the glow of the crystals against the lights is really beautiful, and every year I look forward to this wonderful Evergreen as a highlight of my Season...
Yes, life with a family, especially a large one, is never dull.
And as I sit here, thinking about all that I have to do, all of this along with the things I do for myself ~ reading, drawing, etc. ~ I have to say that I would not change a thing about my life...I really wouldn't.
That is my truth, and I'm sticking to it.

Entry for November 28, 2007 ~ Loving to Read...

2008-08-24T10:19:00.001-07:00

For someone like me, who cannot find enough to read in this lifetime, there is always the hope and prayer that I will be allowed to continue reading in the next...my idea of Heaven is to be able to do what I love to do......
And besides being allowed to draw pictures, I would hope to be able to read as many books as I like!
Of course, being a Roman Catholic, I know in truth that Heaven does not consist of paper and pencil, books and other such materials, but I can certainly dream, can't I?!? These pursuits have been, for me, all my life, the perfect ways to spend a bit of time, whether or not I really have the time is irrelevant.
Being an Artist, my Muse is always turned 'on'...and being an avid reader as well, I constantly feel the call to hold onto any books I can find ~ those about Faerie Tales and Fantasy, my favorite genre, and also those by such authors as Jane Austen and William Shakespeare. There are even times when I am torn between the two activities, so now that my children are grown and no longer need me to be constantly at their sides, I usually divide the time in half...so I can satisfy both cravings.
For example, the other day I posted here that I had started a new Blog for myself ~ an Artist's Blog, if you will ~ where I will post various drawings in progress and my journey with my Muse. That Blog has already been alot of fun to go to, but I am keeping it strictly about my Art.
Here, I can post whatever else I like, other than what I write about my Faith ~ which is my other Blog ~ and the subject of reading has come up more than once in the recent past.
A member of a Group to which I belong had asked what the other members are reading at this time and I answered that I was in the middle of several different things...two or three Catholic readings, and also various magazines to which I subscribe.
There are also, two or three books that I mentioned and those are The Real World of Fairies, by Dora van Gelder/ Summer with the Leprechauns, by Tanis Helliwell/ The Complete Works of Jane Austen, by her...
The book about the Faeries is a delightful romp through the world of the late writer Dora van Gelder, who believed with all her might in the Little People...seeing and hearing them all her life, being in constant touch with them through her gardens, the woods near her home, in her travels all over the globe...and her writing of her experiences with those whom she met. A real treat, if taken in the right context...belief, I assume, is up to the individual reader!
The second book, I admit, has not really been too deeply delved into as of yet, but I intend to get more involved with this novel as soon as I finish the former...I may have to begin it again, but that's ok!
I cannot even remember how many times I have read the works of Jane Austen ~ in my humble opinion, one of the world's greatest authors. The understanding and methods of this woman, who never married in her lifetime, but whose sole interest through her heroines was the state of Matrimony 'and all its diversions'...a true observer of human nature!!! Every time I read one of her novels, I find myself rooting for the boy to get the girl...and I hold my breath until it comes to be.
And that is about it, for now...I shall be 'into' more reading, I'm sure, as time passes ~ I am seldom without something going on where that is concerned ~ but I find that there are not enough hours in the day for all that I wish to do.
So, as any faithful Artist/avid Reader can say ~ I will simply carry on, pencils in one hand, a favorite tome in the other ~ and always the twain shall meet!

Entry for November 22, 2007 ~ Happy Thanksgiving Day!

2008-08-24T10:17:00.000-07:00

Today, traditionally, is the day on which we give our thanks to Almighty God for all that we have, all that we love, all that we are. Being American from birth, I have nothing but 57 years of memories of this feast day, from my earliest existence until today.
And I have much that I am grateful for ~ my family, my home, my Faith ~ these are what matter most to me, and I will thank Him for all of this until my dying day.
On the other hand, my being one of the lucky ones does not excuse me from doing right by my neighbor, he who has not been so lucky in life, who is poor, hungry, cold and homeless. The ones who suffer from having no one to care for them, a life lived without knowing love ~ those are the ones who probably wonder what the rest of us do while keeping warm inside our homes, while our families and friends gather around us to give thanks...while they, on the other hand, watch from without, never knowing what it is to be safe, warm, well-fed and happy.
Will we forget to pray for them? Will we give to their needs? Will we be able to look them in the eye tomorrow and say, 'I tried to help'?!?
A reminder, then, on this Thanksgiving Day, traditionally when we give grateful praise to God ~ give a thought to the ones who suffer, who want, who have nothing ~ and try to remember that we, who have so much, will be asked if we did.
You can be sure, by everything that is holy, that He will ask you......

Entry for November 21, 2007 ~ A New Blog for Me...

2008-08-24T10:16:00.000-07:00

I have decided to start a new Blog.

No, I am not leaving Yahoo 360*...altho' I find that there are some things that can be done with Google's Blogger that I cannot do here...but I do like this one, as well, so besides the one I already have here, which I use for general blogging, and the one I have @ Google that I use for Catholic writings, I will also have another @ Google for posting about my Art, and my answer to my Muse where that is concerned.
This is a decision that I finally reached today, while browsing other Blogs, which other Artists have set up for their own use, to post their drawings/paintings, etc.
I have always liked the idea for myself, and this is the right time, I think...
So, for anyone who is interested to see what I am doing there, here is the link: DrawingIsMyLife
Also, for anyone who cares to read my Catholic ramblings, here is the link to that page, as well: My Musing...
This will be a short entry this evening, as I am going over there right now to post my introductory entry. This should be quite interesting, I think ~ we'll see where it leads me.......

Entry for November 16, 2007 ~ Too early...

2008-08-24T10:13:00.000-07:00

Ok, then...
Today, Friday the 16th of November ~ a good 5.5 weeks before Christmas...and it's starting again...the crowds, the traffic, the mess, the commercialism, the too-early decorations for every holiday/Holy Day between now and Valentine's Day, which will, I'm sure be rearing its pink and red head sometime about the beginning of January.
Today I had to take my daughter to her work ~ and one of the managers is sick, so the owner of the shop asked if my other daughter, who also works there, could stay. She had to take care of some banking and promised to be back as soon as she could, so we had to drive to the bank and try to make it back in a short amount of time, if possible...not that I minded, but the traffic was horrendous! And no one seems to know how to be courteous, cautious, or any other 'ous' that I am sure they must have been taught in driving school.
However, that done, we did make it back to the shop and I dropped her off there, promising to be back at quitting time to pick them up...and then I bravely made the drive home.
So, now safely back home, here I sit @ my laptop, typing away and gratefully sipping my cup o' joe ~ and not envying anyone who is still 'out there' fighting the rude, pushy, dangerous drivers still on the road.
I always have to wonder as I make these drives out and about, where are all these people going? What are they doing out there, and do they feel happy about it? Wouldn't they rather be at home, like I would? Do they 'go crazy' every year at this time, shopping like maniacs, out-buying everyone on their lists, swallowing the whole commercial diatribe like they have no choice?
Last Christmas, we cut back. Our children are older now, they don't need 15 gifts apiece...and they were actually the ones who told me to cut back! I had wanted to for the past few years, but our youngest was still an early teen, so I felt that he deserved as much as the older ones had gotten when they were his age, so I waited until he became 18, and old enough to be considered beyond all that...
Happily, I was, after all, convinced on Christmas morning when, as a family, we gathered around the Tree and passed around our presents, only a few for each, taping the reactions and laughing for hours, literally, spending the time as the loving family that we have grown to be...and not one said anything (that day or since) about only getting 'a couple' of gifts! Besides, they are all working now, so they are buying for each other as well... ...
In my humble opinion, it was one of the best Christmas Days that I have ever experienced...
It occurs to me now, looking back at the last year ~and looking forward to this year's Holy Day ~ that good ol' Saint Nick is a canonized Saint for a reason...he knew the Reason for the Season, and he kept It in his spirit of giving and prayer...his Charity for those less fortunate than himself was unfettered by any crass commercialism like that which abounds in our day and age! He gave from his heart.
I have been observing so-called Autumn decorations going up all over the place, on homes in the neighborhoods and in the stores, and more than one shop being nearly overrun with unnecessary 'decor' for everything from Sweetest Day to the most obscure other-culture type of 'holiday' that one can imagine. There is really only one reason that I can see that one would want to decorate, and that is to make one's home more attractive for a Season that is going on 'at the time'...not two months in advance! I see no advantage in decorating for Christmas in the middle of September, but believe it or not, I have noticed it! Way too early...and just a wee bit silly, as well......
Anyway, there is my rant for the day. I am completely thrown for a loop at the commercialism of our times ~ and wondering 'where will it end?!?'
And when will we begin to understand that the too-early decorations really only serve to make us look like sheep...and pay more attention to what is actually happening right in front of us at the time ~ like treating others (on the road, for instance) the way we want to be treated ~ and taking our lives as they come, not as they will be two months from now?!?

Entry for November 12, 2007 ~ It's Not Our Fault...

2008-08-24T10:12:00.000-07:00

If somebody I know ever has to apply for any kind of benefits at anytime in the future I will tell them what I know about it, and then, without skipping a beat, I will warn them to 'RUN THE OTHER WAY AS FAST AS YOU CAN!!!'
There is nothing in life like filling out 2.5 years worth of paperwork and then being treated by the people 'in the know' as if you were some kind of an idiot.
My husband has been on a medical leave from his job since June, 2005, and he will not ever be allowed by his doctor to return to work. I have been up to my neck in paperwork ever since.
Filling out forms for doctors, hospitals, Social Security, the VA, taxes, schools (read: colleges), and insurance...and that is just the tip of the iceberg.
I have been trying to keep it together all this time, both for the sake of my own sanity and that of my family ~ I mean, if I lose it mentally, who can they depend on then, eh?!?
We have been waiting all this time for Social Security to decide that they will hear our case...and so, last week, we finally got our hearing in front of the judge. Without a moment's hesitation, the first thing he did was scold our lawyer for ten minutes on the importance of being on time with paperwork ~ paperwork which had been mailed to them over a week earlier, but which had not made it to the file yet.
And yet, when they had mailed a form to us to fill out and return 'within five days under penalty of THE LAW' ~ ~ and I had to call them to tell them that we received it four days after they had mailed it to us (and it even included a section that had to be filled out over the course of three days), I was the one at fault!
'What do you mean, it just got there!?! This is Thursday, we mailed it on Monday! How dare you not get your mail on time!'
'I'm sorry. It won't happen again.'
'Well, that's better! Just get it back to our office as soon as possible ~ you still have three weeks.'
I was told by our lawyer that I was to wait in the outside room while the hearing took place, and that the judge would summon me if he needed to talk to me...which he never did, thank the Almighty ...and after it was all over, they (my husband and the lawyer) came out of the hearing room both looking as if they'd been kicked in the stomach.
'Oh, don't worry ~ this judge is human, like you and me ~ he puts his pants on one leg at a time, no worries!'
'Well, then I won't worry ~ much.'
Well, after hearing my dearest explain all that went on in there, I have to say that this judge must be a different kind of human than I am...I do not scold people for things that are not their fault, I don't treat disabled vets as if they are dirt, and I certainly don't expect miracles from everyday people to fix things that are not under their control, like the workings of the Post Office or the Federal Government!!!
Contrary to what they may believe, this money which is handed out to millions every month from the Social Security coffers is money that they have been earning for all the years they have worked, even though I have been told that it comes from other sources...then why the weekly tax on my husband's paycheck for 35 years, hmm-mm-m???
He is legitimately disabled, and it is the fault of the Government. The VA had no problem admitting this ~ why are the rules for another branch of that same Government any different than that?
He will finally be able to collect that which is OWED to him by this same Government which put him in harm's way nearly 40 years ago. That is the least they can do!!!
And for myself, I will say, 'How dare you take so long?'

Entry for November 03, 2007 ~ Speaking of Michael...and me...

2008-08-24T10:07:00.000-07:00

It has come to my attention that, in a Group to which I belong, right here on Yahoo, that no one knows I have changed since my very beginnings, so *ahem* I am about to change that myth...
I have never denied being a bit different than what I may appear to be now, as you see me in my present state. (This is, thanks to Almighty God, the result of many years of learning, tried and true!)
But the fact remains, and I cannot change it ~ nor would I want to ~ I do have a past part of me, one who followed what everyone else thought I should be, and not what I already was. As I move through this mortal life, there is definitely one thing I can claim: I have lived my life.
I grew up in typical suburbia, the fourth of six children, and always feeling different than the others...why, I have only to hazard a guess...but there it is. And it is the truth, as I see it. Ever since I can remember, I have felt this vast difference, apart from my own family. Not as a bad way to be, oh no ~ but definitely not like the rest.
My parents were always there to remind me, especially my Mother ~ 'Jennifer Marie, you have your head in the clouds again!' or 'You're a real dreamer; when are you going to wake up?'
I had always wanted to make my way drawing pictures...but heaven forbid! One cannot make a living that way, as they told me ~ so I was talked into becoming an Art teacher. I never really wanted to do this, but to keep the peace, I went along with the 'Grand Plan'. I must have been out of my head...
Then, as I drifted from mundane job to mundane job, I was always feeling that call to draw pictures. So, in my spare time, that was exactly what I did ~ not so much to make money (impossible, remember?), but just for fun and to keep my hand in my Art. In the meantime, I moved out on my own, finding a flat with a friend, and I was on my way.
As I grew into my new life, I began to date my future husband, Michael, who has believed in me always right from the start. We had been best friends for months and finally began to merge into the couple that we are today.
He has, I am happy to report, always seen me for what I truly am, regardless of how my family saw me even from the days of my very childhood!
He has encouraged me to be what I have always wanted to be...and now that our children are grown, and I have more time on my hands, I can finally pursue my Art in a more serious fashion than I ever have before...not withstanding anyone's lack of confidence in me, my ability as an Artist, or my drive to get where I want to go.
If I create a piece to give away, sell or keep ~ it really doesn't matter to him or to me. People in my own family are constantly asking me, 'Are you still drawing pictures?' to which I respond, 'I have never stopped! And you...are you still breathing?' ...just goes to show how well they don't know 'yours truly'... ...
There are many facets to my life that are hidden from those who profess to know me and my life ~ and I choose to keep it that way. Family members who could not care less about anything I do, what I have been through, where I am going...to them I say, 'Nice try, but no cigar! Think of me however you like, it won't change a thing.'
And to my 'real' family, or those who know me best, I say, 'Well done! You have always understood. You know more about my ways than anyone else who has professed to know me since Day One. You are the ones to whom I will be close for the rest of my days.'
I feel no need to explain myself to those who fall into this group ~ they have been here since the beginning of my life with Michael. They have seen my growth, both as a Catholic wife and mother, and as the Artist that I have always been, even though those who were there in the very beginning refused to see it, as they couldn't see the 'real me' anyways! (I can really only think of one or two who differ from the norm, here...)
And to those who can sit back and judge what they perceive from afar, as if they could possibly know anything about me in the first place, I have no desire to explain.
Nor will I ever... ...

Entry for October 23, 2007 ~ Back Home...

2008-08-24T10:06:00.000-07:00

My Michael is home again ~ after another stay in the hospital, this time for his kidneys and blood pressure.
Why is it that we sometimes take for granted how we feel about someone or assume that he or she will always be here for us?!? I try not to but after more than thirty years with this wonderful, loving man, I admit that I sometimes do exactly that.
I don't mean to say that I 'walk all over him' ~ that's not it at all. It's just that, until something happens, we go through our 'day to day' thinking that it will always be like this...
We got a call from the doctor late Thursday evening telling us that he needed to go to the ER for some blood work; it seems that a blood panel (which was ordered mysteriously by we still don't know whom) showed that his potassium was higher than it was supposed to be...so we went in Friday morning, and found out about the blood pressure as well.
When one is a diabetic, one must be so careful with everything it seems...eating, medicines, doctor's appointments, exercise...EVERYTHING!
He ended up spending the next three days as an inpatient, with his BP and his potassium being closely monitored, and he stabilized on Sunday, so he was discharged. I have him back now and I am back to my calm self.
But I can honestly say that I will never, EVER, for my entire life, take one moment with my dearest for granted ~ ever, ever, EVER!!!
'nuff said......

Entry for October 17, 2007 ~ More for the Garden?

2008-08-24T10:05:00.000-07:00

Ok, then...it's Autumn now...finally!
The color is out, the garden is filling up with Nature's compost, and I am loving this cooler weather!
I did get all my new flowers planted (thankfully) and it only took me three days...I cannot wait to see all this new color in the Spring.
And that brings me to the subject of today's Blog ~ the Four Seasons. For those who like the warming up of the air after a chilly Winter, there is the Spring ~ cool in the early days, gradually stretching into warmth after a month or two, the first flowers poking out and the trees donning their greens...Spring is not my favorite time of the year, mainly because I never know how to dress. But I like it better than I used to, now that I have my gardens to keep me happy. I do admit that I love the Spanish bluebells, the tulips and daffodils (even tho' mine are all yellow and they were supposed to be pink!), and my all-time favorite flower, the mighty columbine, starts its annual bloom in the late Spring...early Summer.
Maybe that's why I am starting to like Summer more than I used to, as well...since this flower (even tho' I have several varieties) is always happy to greet me from its place(s) as I come and go. And the roses ~ beautiful, as always ~ who doesn't love a rose?!? So, Summer, I must admit, is becoming a more tolerable Season for me than it ever used to be!
And as it moves on into a later Season, with the roses still giving their heady show, there is also the hydrangea, which is a never-ending kaleidoscope of hues...and all in one bush! I only have two, so far, so that's saying alot ~ still full of flowers after nearly three months of bloom!
Now, of course, with the beginning of Autumn, there is color EVERYWHERE! If I walk through my gardens, I see it in the late-Summer roses, the hydrangeas and lady bells (a lovely blue shade ) and all the rest...and I can also look up and see it everywhere above me, too...trees covered in multi-colored leaves, falling gracefully to fill the yard. And it's just starting...
Fall has always been my favorite time of year; I always loved the cooler air, the warmer clothes, the crispness of leaves crunching under my feet as I walked along...
As the Season moves on, I know it will become colder and colder and finally, it will become Winter ~ with all the blowing, blustering, blizzard-ing of that frosty time of year ~ and I will welcome it!
A break from the yard work, although still dreaming of being 'out there' at the same time...
Cozy-ing up to the warmth and darkness of shorter days and longer nights...
Never getting enough snow...
And then, thankfully, just as I have begun to think that this is all that there is, the start of Spring all over again! And the advent of all those new flowers that I planted just last week ~ mostly irises, a few more tulips ~ and the parade of Seasons starts anew.
Yes, now that I stop to think of it, I don't really have a favorite Season anymore ~ I believe I have said this before ~ that with every change comes a new beginning, a new 'color' and a new way to be...
And I can say with all honesty that I love every minute of it!

Entry for October 07, 2007 ~ Respect Life Sunday...

2008-08-24T10:03:00.000-07:00

As anyone who comes to my Blog here knows by now, I am a wife and a mother ~ of eight children, two more in Heaven.

I have a deep and abiding love for my own family, and also, for mankind at large.
Today is Respect Life Sunday, which is promoted in every Catholic church throughout the world as a time for prayer and for action. To pray for the lives of the unborn, the infirm, the disabled, the aged.
I have two Blogs, the one at Google's Blogger, which I keep Catholic, and this one here on Yahoo where I write about anything and everything.
I was going to post about my new garden flowers, which were delivered finally in yesterday's packages, but I have changed my mind. I can write about flowers anytime. The garden will be there for many years to come...especially since the flowers I ordered are all perennials.
But will the babies be here in two days? A year? Years from now? Will their mothers, fathers, grandparents, doctors embrace them and call them their own? Or will they be aborted, either by burning with acid, torn apart with pincers, or by any other Mengele-like torture that our so-called 'modern' society can dream up?
What about the disabled and infirm? Will they be properly taken care of? Will they be given a decent place in which to live? Decent clean clothes? Warmth in the Winter? Enough food to eat? Or will they be shoved aside, left to starve in the streets, ignored and beaten down by those who think they know better? ...or think they ARE better?!?
And how about the elderly, either in our homes or in retirement centers, where they are left to lie in their beds, urine-soaked and half-starved? Robbed blind of their humanity and very dignity as Children of God...what of them?
Bl. Margaret of Costello was born handicapped ~ blind, hunchbacked, pock-marked. Her parents, who were horrified that their daughter should be so 'imperfect', left her alone, locked in a hut deep in the woods and sent servants to bring her food. But she was denied any loving human contact.
Finally, a priest who had heard of her plight, went to teach her about the Faith...and she was overjoyed when he told her that Our Lord was also kept a Prisoner! 'O let me be like Him!' was her constant prayer after that...
When she got older, she was allowed to leave the prison in which she had been living for years...and some charitable people took her to live with them in a nearby town. There, she inspired everyone she met with the love of her God ~ when she died, her funeral was attended by many hundreds of people...and miracles started happening almost immediately, all through her powerful intercession with her 'Prisoner' Lord!
Bl. Margaret is just one of many Saints who have lived the pro-life message to the letter of God's Law.
Would that we could all be just a little more like her......