It has long been a bane of my existence that I have to shop. I am not speaking of the once-in-a-while clothes shopping (altho' I hate that as well) or now and then needing a new refrigerator or coffee table.
No, what I am talking about is GROCERY (and various other daily sundries) shopping...that every day, "Mom! No milk?" "Are we out of shampoo again?!?" "I can't find the lawn bags! Don't tell me we don't have any more lawn bags!?!"
And the list goes on and on and on...
Where is it written that a Mother's main raison d'etre is to shop? Tell me, I'd really like to know.
I can spend an entire day driving all over town, dropping this one off, picking this one up, making it to appointments, stopping for a quick visit in church to the Blessed Sacrament, visiting my Mom...and yet, when I get home, even after all that ~ "Mom! Did you get more toilet paper?!?"
I shake my head, as I slip out of my dripping wet shoes, shrugging off my coat, dropping my purse onto the nearest couch. "No! I was not aware that we were out of it."
Ok, I will go now...as I slip back on my dripping wet shoes, shrug back into my coat, pick up my purse and head for the door.
"Oh yeah, and we need bread. And cheese. And Dad's out of Pepsi. And can I borrow a couple of bucks for my lunch tomorrow?"
So, I guess that also means a side trip now to the nearest ATM, which, not by accident, is located totally out of the way ~ thereby necessitating a longer drive just to get some extra cash, which I had had no intention of pulling out in the first place!
"And when you get home, can I borrow a lift to so-and-so's house?"
By the time I am finally done, my day is shot.
I had planned to work on my daughter's flower designs for her wedding, coming up faster than it rightfully should, and maybe get in some reading, cleaning a room (heaven forbid!) or perhaps fixing a dinner on time for once.
All of this and much more ~ that is what I do. I look at the housework and am told by my loving family "not to worry" but still I do. I feel somewhat guilty about sitting at my drawing table, but I also still do that anyway. I spend time on this laptop of mine, not wasting it, but trying desperately to keep up with friends online and reading for my Faith...where I have learned so much, and would like to continue to do so...
Yet, surprisingly, things do get done around here! I have no idea how or when it came to this, but I have to wonder, "How did that happen? When did they become so responsible, so helpful?"
And what do I get for my trouble? I'll tell you what I get...
I come home, after fighting the traffic wars, running errands for the family, keeping up with appointments for my husband and his doctors or for various trips for the kids...and I find the living room has been vacuumed (by one of the girls) or the laundry has been finished and put away. Dinner is cooking (thank-you, my loving spouse) and the snow has been shoveled from the sidewalks and driveway (sometimes by the girls, sometimes by our son Stephen). The birds have been fed and watered, the mail has been sorted and handed out, the other groceries (bought earlier in the day) have all been put away. During the warmer weather, the grass has been cut and trimmed (by Stephen) and the garbage has been put out (also by him, and sometimes without a reminder, lol), and the dishes have been put away.
Does anyone out there wonder why I do what I do for my family?
Every home has a 'way' to run, and the people who live in it are all responsible for various turns at these 'ways'. I guess, for now at least, my 'way' is to keep things on the outside running smoothly ~ all the errands I have to take care of, no one else can do right now ~ so I will continue to do them until I am no longer needed to do so.
And as long as the family takes care of some of my load here at the house, then I'm fine.
Someday, I expect, I will not be so 'raggedly run' and I can finally sit and drink that second cup of coffee...taking in the vista of my own abode, here in my corner of the world...and bring to mind all the memories of various 'things to do' lists...and wish those days could be here again.
In the meantime, I will be content to do whatever I have to do to get things done, all day, if that's what it takes ~ and be grateful that I have a family for whom to do it!
And then I will look back, shrug my shoulders and ask myself, "How did that happen? How did they all get to their respective ends? How did I finally make it to where I am now?"
And I will sit, sip my cup o' Joe, and wonder......